It's GREAT to be back!
For the benefit of my own sanity, as I can't fathom anyone actually taking the time to read this jumble of wordage without immediately pressing the back button with vigor, I would like to structure this Progress Doohickey in a series of sub-sectioned updates, being:
Life As I Know It - The section most applicable to being as unread as Stevie Wonder's library. It will act as a vessel for all of my trivial grievances with the world and those who inhabit it.
Mind, Body and My Ever-Expanding Erection - It sounds all new age and bullshit I know, but I recently had an epiphany. Instead of only trying to improve one facet of my life in the pursuit of happiness, why couldn't I improve every part of myself? From a gamblers perspective, it's really much safer a bet! I shall provide a daily record of my progress in PE, while also noting my endeavor into Calisthenics (using your own body weight to get more ripped than Shaq's girlfriend after a win) and my pursuit of not being quite so much of a dick.
From One Member to Another - Since I haven't yet been able to solve all of life's mysteries, I would like to call upon my fellow phallus-forgers to share their knowledge and wisdom! This could range from a question regarding PE, to the best way to hide a body (kidding! or am I?).
Self-Gratifying, Motivational Quote of the Day - I don't know about you guys, but I have the tendency to lose focus on my goals... So what better way is there to remedy this, than with an inspirational quote from a wise bastard to keep your fire burning?! adult entertainment, adult entertainment is a better way...
Life As I Know It
After having somewhat of a hiatus from PE and this fantastic forum for a little over a year, I have reared my head again (pun intended), and let me tell you - I'm cocked (sorry...) and ready to go!
University (College to my American compatriots) in all of it's time and energy-sapping splendor, has released me from it's death grip and gave me an engineering degree as compensation! So... what shall I do with the time amassed between job searching, part-time working and revolting against the current establishment of 1% (that ensures that the rich get richer and the poor get poorer, by bailing out their wanker banker friends and landing us in stupefying debt for the crime of merely meagerly living, consequently cock-blocking the notion of an equal and truly democratic society)?... PE of course!
A Little Background Check
I'd like to fill you in (giggity...) on my humble journey into PE so far. I've been an intermittent PE'er since 2008, when I stumbled haphazardly onto this forum, in search of the seemingly impossible - a bigger penis. I started the beginner's routine, compromising Jelqs and simple stretches, which at the time I must admit seemed as useful as jacking off into a wind tunnel... However, over the first few months, I noticed my gigglestick getting a little thicker, and a little longer. Encouraged by this, I began researching into the reasons for this fantastic predicament, that I was assured by WebMD was as plausible as Oscar Pistorius's defense.
I read everything, from the anatomy of the penis,positive-thinking techniques, to the more advanced techniques used by some low swinging veterans, hoping to be sufficiently learned enough to grow it as big as I could dream. I began to fortify my routine with exercises founded on theories that made sense to me, like Slow Squash Jelqs, Bundled Stretches, knowing even then that the key to continual growth is continual growth of my knowledge.
More recently, I purchased a [words=https://officialhydromaxpump.com/?uid=6&oid=2&affid=98]Bathmate[/words] [words=https://officialhydromaxpump.com/?uid=6&oid=2&affid=98]X30[/words] in an uncharacteristically brave move to see what the fuss was about, and what a game changer! Expansion like I've never seen before, a penis that looked as if it had been injecting steroids, and a smile/grimace on the face of my girlfriend when she felt the full extent of my training... and my penis.
Currently, after a year of casual fun with the [words=https://officialhydromaxpump.com/?uid=6&oid=2&affid=98]Bathmate[/words] [words=https://officialhydromaxpump.com/?uid=6&oid=2&affid=98]X30[/words], I have dedicated myself once more to turning my penis into something more feared than a shoe box in an airport. DLD's [words=http://www.mattersofsize.com/forum/showthread.php?64036-My-Best-Work-Ever-Penis-Enlargement-will-Be-Changed-Forever-gt-gt-Gain%20inches%20with%20SRT-Theory-and-Routine]SRT[/words] method has given structure to my sporadic routine, and
with it I hope to reach my goals sooner rather than later!
Mind, Body and My Ever-Expanding Erection
Mind - Money really is the root of all evil...
I've recently been reading the biography come call of change, Revolution - by Russell Brand. Yes, he is a bit controversial in his views, but I find him to be an excellent communicator of opinions. I actually agree with a lot he states as mandates for a better human society, such as a fairer distribution of wealth (no duh), localized food production (America exports as much beef as it imports, riddle me the logic in that!) and perhaps most importantly, true democracy. In America, there has never been a presidential election where the side with more money hasn't won - how about that people power, huh? We are many and those in power so few, and yet we continue to be trod over...
It got me thinking about my own self, and how trapped in a greedy construct we really are, full of materialistic urges all to readily catered for by the very people who gave us that shallow desire in the first place. So I'm gonna be the change I want to see in the world and stop being so self-centered, which is really hard! Do you give to charity to help others, or to feel better about wearing sweatshop shoes?
Body - Handstand push-ups are easy... NOT!
Well after about a month of this Calisthenics malarkey, I have finally mastered (sort of...) the art of handstand push-ups! Granted, I can't do too many of them, but I do feel fitter than I ever have been! Does also make me feel a little like Bruce Lee... that is until I tumble out of one and smash into a table like an office party drunk! Despite the bruises, however, I'd say to anyone struggling with the monotony of gym sessions, give it a try.
A fantastic video for your viewing pleasure! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=twlBJnBvpSY
My Ever-Expanding Erection - The Routine and the Reinvented [words=http://www.mattersofsize.com/forum/penis-enlargement-forum/12539-slow-squash-jelq-nothing-give-me-better-expansion.html]Slow Squash Jelq[/words]
Since I am forgetful, I shall put my routine down below for my own benefit, however if it helps anyone else then you're welcome and I accept donations...
Morning Routine - Stretching the Snake
3 Sets and 30 Seconds of each of the following;-
Straight Down to the Left
Straight Down to the Center
Straight Down to the Right
Straight Down Rotary Stretches
Straight Out to the Left
Straight Out to the Center
Straight Out to the Right
Straight Out Rotary Stretches
Straight Up to the Left
Straight Up to the Center
Straight Up to the Right
Straight Up Rotary Stretches
Afternoon Routine - Pump Up The Volume
Warm up by performing Bundled Stretches, until the point at which your penis feels warm, puffier, and more malleable is reached.
The Main Event
AAG's Twisted Squash Jelq: 5 Minutes of performance.
[words=https://officialhydromaxpump.com/?uid=6&oid=2&affid=98]Bathmate[/words] at Full Intensity: 5 Minutes
AAG's Twisted Squash Jelq: 5 Minutes of performance.
[words=https://officialhydromaxpump.com/?uid=6&oid=2&affid=98]Bathmate[/words] at Full Intensity: 5 Minutes
AAG's Twisted Squash Jelq: 5 Minutes of performance.
[words=https://officialhydromaxpump.com/?uid=6&oid=2&affid=98]Bathmate[/words] at Full Intensity: 5 Minutes
AAG's Twisted Squash Jelq: 5 Minutes of performance.
If you like it, put a ring on it (sorry...)
After this routine is completed, go ahead and slap on a silicone cock ring, or a Cable Clamp (at a low intensity) and keep it on until bedtime.
In accordance with the [words=http://www.mattersofsize.com/forum/showthread.php?64036-My-Best-Work-Ever-Penis-Enlargement-will-Be-Changed-Forever-gt-gt-Gain%20inches%20with%20SRT-Theory-and-Routine]SRT[/words] method, it is important to keep the penis at its enhanced volume for as long as possible, in order to trick the body into thinking that this is your actual size.
AAG's Twisted Squash Jelq
So you may be wondering what this is all about, looking at it like an illegal immigrant called Rick - so similar, yet so obviously an impostor... Let me explain:
How:
Whilst with a full erection, grab the base of your penis with a OK grip, pushing it up the shaft a little in order to increase the pressure. Then, squeeze the head of the penis to allow for more flexibility. After this, use an overhand OK grip with your remaining hand just below the glans, slowly twisting the penis until it won't rotate any further. From here, use the heel of the hand at the glans, to push down onto the glans, bending the penis into an arc shape. Maintain this arc for around 30 seconds, before releasing the top hand, allowing the penis to straighten. Keep the base hand in the same grip however.
I cannot over-emphasize the importance of knowing your limitations here: Be careful! This really is a high pressure situation for your penis.
Why:
The reason for me conjuring such an exercise is due to my love of two others (no, I'm not a polygamist...) - Slow Squash Jelqs and Bundled Stretch. Knowing firsthand of the expansion that comes with [words=http://www.mattersofsize.com/forum/penis-enlargement-forum/12539-slow-squash-jelq-nothing-give-me-better-expansion.html]SSJ[/words]'s and the stretching of the tunica with the bundles, I was curious to attempt a hybrid of the two. The result is the Twisted Squash Jelq. It allows for expansion and tunica stretching in the same action, which has in my experience with it, allowed for increased volume over doing both exercises on their own. The width of my penis especially seems to increase very visibly whilst performing it, and the long term results I have had are impressive. I believe the reason for the effectiveness of TSJ's is due to the fact that, when releasing a stretch on the tunica, it will no doubt regress slowly to it's original size, however, here it is not allowed to do so whilst a pressure is exerted.
3 Sets and 30 Seconds of each of the following;-
Straight Down to the Left
Straight Down to the Center
Straight Down to the Right
Straight Down Rotary Stretches
Straight Out to the Left
Straight Out to the Center
Straight Out to the Right
Straight Out Rotary Stretches
Straight Up to the Left
Straight Up to the Center
Straight Up to the Right
Straight Up Rotary Stretches
Afternoon Routine - Pump Up The Volume
Warm up by performing Bundled Stretches, until the point at which your penis feels warm, puffier, and more malleable is reached.
The Main Event
AAG's Twisted Squash Jelq: 5 Minutes of performance.
[words=https://officialhydromaxpump.com/?uid=6&oid=2&affid=98]Bathmate[/words] at Full Intensity: 5 Minutes
AAG's Twisted Squash Jelq: 5 Minutes of performance.
[words=https://officialhydromaxpump.com/?uid=6&oid=2&affid=98]Bathmate[/words] at Full Intensity: 5 Minutes
AAG's Twisted Squash Jelq: 5 Minutes of performance.
[words=https://officialhydromaxpump.com/?uid=6&oid=2&affid=98]Bathmate[/words] at Full Intensity: 5 Minutes
AAG's Twisted Squash Jelq: 5 Minutes of performance.
If you like it, put a ring on it (sorry...)
After this routine is completed, go ahead and slap on a silicone cock ring, or a Cable Clamp (at a low intensity) and keep it on until bedtime.
In accordance with the [words=http://www.mattersofsize.com/forum/showthread.php?64036-My-Best-Work-Ever-Penis-Enlargement-will-Be-Changed-Forever-gt-gt-Gain%20inches%20with%20SRT-Theory-and-Routine]SRT[/words] method, it is important to keep the penis at its enhanced volume for as long as possible, in order to trick the body into thinking that this is your actual size.
AAG's Twisted Squash Jelq
So you may be wondering what this is all about, looking at it like an illegal immigrant called Rick - so similar, yet so obviously an impostor... Let me explain:
How:
Whilst with a full erection, grab the base of your penis with a OK grip, pushing it up the shaft a little in order to increase the pressure. Then, squeeze the head of the penis to allow for more flexibility. After this, use an overhand OK grip with your remaining hand just below the glans, slowly twisting the penis until it won't rotate any further. From here, use the heel of the hand at the glans, to push down onto the glans, bending the penis into an arc shape. Maintain this arc for around 30 seconds, before releasing the top hand, allowing the penis to straighten. Keep the base hand in the same grip however.
I cannot over-emphasize the importance of knowing your limitations here: Be careful! This really is a high pressure situation for your penis.
Why:
The reason for me conjuring such an exercise is due to my love of two others (no, I'm not a polygamist...) - Slow Squash Jelqs and Bundled Stretch. Knowing firsthand of the expansion that comes with [words=http://www.mattersofsize.com/forum/penis-enlargement-forum/12539-slow-squash-jelq-nothing-give-me-better-expansion.html]SSJ[/words]'s and the stretching of the tunica with the bundles, I was curious to attempt a hybrid of the two. The result is the Twisted Squash Jelq. It allows for expansion and tunica stretching in the same action, which has in my experience with it, allowed for increased volume over doing both exercises on their own. The width of my penis especially seems to increase very visibly whilst performing it, and the long term results I have had are impressive. I believe the reason for the effectiveness of TSJ's is due to the fact that, when releasing a stretch on the tunica, it will no doubt regress slowly to it's original size, however, here it is not allowed to do so whilst a pressure is exerted.
From One Member to Another
My question for today, my fellow members, is:
How did you get on with the TSJ's? Did you notice a larger increase in expansion when coupled with the [words=https://officialhydromaxpump.com/?uid=6&oid=2&affid=98]Bathmate[/words], when compared to an [words=http://www.mattersofsize.com/forum/penis-enlargement-forum/12539-slow-squash-jelq-nothing-give-me-better-expansion.html]SSJ[/words]? Did you even understand how to perform it?
Any feedback will be hungrily consumed, I assure you!
Self-Gratifying, Motivational Quote of the Day
"You've got to get up every morning with determination if you're going to go to bed with satisfaction." - George Horace Lorimer