pe in jail?

what are some techniques and stuff I can use to do Penis Enlargement in jail, descretely. keep in mind if anyone looks like they're jerkin it in the shower they get a slap at minimum. There's very little to use as equipment, shoelaces aren't around in my area. You also have a cellmate most of the time so its gotta be quite at night... no lubes and stuff. just in case i ever go back and I dont wana lose my gains... I've heard of dry jelqing. and im pretty sure i can do a super squash jelq, but I dont know how to dry jelq or anything like that. anyone with experience at this or suggestions is welcomed to post them. thanks.

Y'ever thought: don't go back?
Yeah: don't go back.

thats easy to say if you dont have a record. the last time I was in all I did was defend myself but it didnt matter cuz I had a record, cops did a slack job, and the so called victims didnt have records.

I suggest doing lazy ass stretch and uli. Do a couple of uli on your morning wood.

yep its always the cops fault. how about try this. don't get a record in the first place. if you do, man up and don't bitch about it and don't blame others for your own mistake. if you do go back to jail (its because you broke the law AGAIN) and you deserve to be there, don't bitch about the cops doing their jobs. Cops don't just throw people in jail for no reason. Its not possible.

ive always wondered about this cause i have a overly sickening see-every-scenario habit and your right it would have to be done at night , what i would suggest is that you must prepare your mind first , specifically your concentration effort to count up to unlimited amount of seconds and doing this all in your head (no cheating and saying it aloud !) , when your laying under the covers pull one certain stretch at medium intensity for at least 200-500 seconds ( i know there is no clock , so there is no room for cheating , what i would do is buy a stopwatch and sync your mind to that stopwatch ) , then while your resting do a lazy ass stretch and fall asleep when pain persists more than tolerable you will wake up dont worry , then do another medium intensity stretch toward another angle for 200-500 seconds , then massage for maximum flaccid circulation, then do another lazy ass stretch and fall asleep again , repeat this cycle 3-10 times depending on your expierience in this routine , your goal is to make the lazy ass stretch a all night stretcher exercise ( ANSE) , then when you have morning wood ( cause you will shift in your sleep , causing your dick to come loose ) do double hand jelqs , ssjs , and whatever else you think can be used as a girth exercise dry , remember the mind comes first , without that you will fail in this routine , train your mind and achieve more discipline than you ever thought you could attain

good luck and hope this helps ,
novice

defend yourself as in "that guy looked at my gf and I had to defend myself?"

Seriously though, most of us will not have a clue. I'd go for a manual stretching routine with some dry jelqing afterwards.

I was in Soledad State prison for 2 years and kept my back to the shower wall at all times. Unless you shower alone, don't ever give anyone your back in the shower. I got in trouble while in there and got put in solitude in a cell all to myself. That was the best thing I ever did in prison. I loved it in solitude alone with no other fuckers bothering me etc. In a cell to yourself you can Penis Enlargement but not in general population.

It's best not to look like you are masturbating or playing with yourself in any way while in prison or you will get gang raped. Good luck and keep your back to the wall.

And just how will the fact of having an existing record cause you to return to jail?

qwertyking;463337 said:

thats easy to say if you dont have a record. the last time I was in all I did was defend myself but it didnt matter cuz I had a record, cops did a slack job, and the so called victims didnt have records.

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I'm not going to get into the whole lot of details of what happened the night that landed me a years dead time in jail waiting for trial, while being innocent. The several months I waited for a damn bail hearing with a lawyer is not justice. The fact is, I've made mistakes in the past and turned to a better life before I caught my last charge. I was waiting for a pardon for my crimes(and I still am). The way justice SHOULD work is not based on my criminal record(unless we're talking bail) contrary to popular belief by most of society even though it does play a role in how the police officers will spend their time looking at all of the witness statements. A police officer generally has about 8-10 months of training before he gets his badge which isn't a whole lot. Not saying the all get corrupted or all are dull, but on this night I had a few trying to get the thing over with ASAP. While some are, lets say, harder working and like to read and reread all of the witness statements to find contradictions and truthfulness in the event others are not. It was 4 vs 1, they all wrote statements that hugely contradicted one another because the police rolled up right in the middle of it all and questioned them individually so they had not much time to make up a story. Third party witnesses' statements were largely against their statements and all fit together. The police just took their statements and weighed them against me along with my criminal record and pressed a charge regardless of what other people were saying. With prison overpopulation and too few courtrooms it took me a whole year to get out.

It's frustrating hearing this from people who don't really know anything about me or what happened and at best have heard this second hand. Or the ones who pretty much base their information on a few episodes of Cops, or are a good cop and work with only good police officers and don't see this kind of stuff. I didn't go to jail because I "broke the law again" and I wasn't served justice. Cops do throw people in jail for no reason and I don't see why anyone couldn't find that possible. They can just write a report that makes it 'seem' like a good reason on paper and who's going to know the difference? Many police are corrupt in a judicial sense and will throw a man in jail due to lack of investigation or due to the fact that they think they are cleaning up the streets because most criminal pasts never end in rehabilitation, at least where I'm from(it's over 50% return rate I think). I'm not saying this type of stuff happens every day, all day, with everyone in this city... It just DOES happen.

What I'm trying to say is that if this somewhat rare type of incident ever happens again I may be stuck inside for months without a bail hearing and may lose a lot of my gains if I don't know what to do. Thanks to those of you who took this seriously and didn't decide to go judge Judy on me and actually gave me advice. I'm concerned these people who acted against me may cross paths and decide to make up a story for the cops even if they're the ones who attacked me again. They're a cheap cowardly bunch, I've come to learn and they may just try their hand at hiding behind police again when shit goes bad so I want to be prepared since I plan to use Penis Enlargements for the next few years.

To ADF: Sounds rough. I'm still a kid pretty much though, if anyone raped me its an unsaid fact they'd get it bad... At least up here in Canada. We've got better prisons compared to the US. Not too much of that kind of stuff up here. The most I can handle in the hole is 2 weeks. I start losing my marbles after about 12 days or so unless there's someone next to me to talk to.

To SirKyle: I'm not an idiot man. This was serious.

To Bjembe: Whats a uli?

What, exactly, is a dry jelq. I haven't seen any info on them on this site or the members site.

qwertyking;463450 said:

What, exactly, is a dry jelq. I haven't seen any info on them on this site or the members site.

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It is just like the jelq but no lube is used. I feel it helps prevent discoloration compared to the wet jelq.

I didn't ask about your life's history & the Canadian judicial system really isn't pertinent.
My original question remains, however, unanswered:

MAXAMEYES;463394 said:

And just how will the fact of having an existing record cause you to return to jail?

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If you get given a jail sentence and your first thought it 'Fuck, how am I gonna keep my gains I got from my new jelq routine?!'... you have your priorities a little off.

I did answer the question and it relates to the Canadian judicial system. If I didn't have the record the police wouldn't have been as likely to charge me and would of looked into it more. They check their computers in their squad cars and it DOES decide what happens regardless of how things SHOULD work. If they assume I'm a career criminal they may decide it best to press a charge and lock me up regardless if its just to do so, just to clean up the streets. It was around the time of what is referred to as "spring clean up". The jails are packed with people around that time just to get their statistics up for politics.

To the last post: You can only do so much about your priorities in jail, you can only spend so much time talking to your lawyer and stuff and if I possibly can it would be a nice way of the time spent in there in whats called 'dead time'- meaning your still awaiting trial and haven't been proven innocent or guilty... remanded in other words. It would be nice to keep my gains weather or not it is a priority or not... just saying...

This thread is getting stupid and moving away from the point of the OP. So please if you have advice on an issue regarding Penis Enlargement and can instruct me on what a Dry Jelq is or an uli so I know I'd greatly appreciate it. I can imagine how to 'dry jelq' but I wouldn't be surprised if it's a little different than I imagined. Just grip the base and push the blood up with one single hand? Then do it all over with the same hand?.... how effective is this as opposed to wet jelqing?

sry for last question. didnt see DLD's explanation. thanks

A dry jelq can be done erect or not, you just jelq without lube.

An ULI is a girth exercise when you're erect. Search it in the search bar for a full explanation.

Oh little one who practices avoidance of reality.
The answer to my question is, simply: NO-merely having a criminal record will NOT, I repeat NOT cause you to be sent to jail.
Your behavior, arrest and subsequent conviction of a crime will send you to jail.

And you if you, at present, are actually facing re-incarceration and your primary priority is enlarging your penis then you've got priorities so, how do I put this gently, fucked up beyond belief then nobody here is going to be able to help ya.

My original advice holds: Don't go back in. Then you can view MOS in peace, freedom and leisure.

MAXAMEYES;463481 said:

I didn't ask about your life's history & the Canadian judicial system really isn't pertinent.
My original question remains, however, unanswered:

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Wouldn't be calling me a baby. You don't know much about me even if you think you do. It's not like I'm asking for anyone's sympathy just trying to get it known that I half expect to see the inside of a cell and why since people seem to need that kind of info to just answer my question on what to do to keep my gains if it happens. Shit. You can get a pizza in jail and even some brew if you wanted it bad enough.

I know your type though. Big muscle, long dick style on the internet yet you really need this shit to get any points at all.

The question was asked, oh little man of exagerrated temper, (insight into part of your problem perhaps), was to get you to hopefully think a bit beyond what you can put into your hand. Think about what you may need to put into your life, your expectations, your definition of self and how you relate to the greater world around you.
That what you expect from life and what you put into living are, most often, what you receive in return.


Given your response, I just don't think you'll get it.
Enjoy your time.

qwertyking;463511 said:

Wouldn't be calling me a baby. You don't know much about me even if you think you do. It's not like I'm asking for anyone's sympathy just trying to get it known that I half expect to see the inside of a cell and why since people seem to need that kind of info to just answer my question on what to do to keep my gains if it happens. Shit. You can get a pizza in jail and even some brew if you wanted it bad enough.

I know your type though. Big muscle, long dick style on the internet yet you really need this shit to get any points at all.

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