My girl slept with another guy (possibly unprotected) and never told me!

matts22;294819 said:

Ok, maybe it's just me, but I would fuck with her a little bit if I was you. I've been in similar situations where after a week or two I'd go tell her something like what you said...and it really doesn't sink in with them. I know your point is to make her realize what she is going to be missing, but what that is saying in "girl talk" is that you are insecure and had to tell her that to make yourself feel better. What I would do instead is just be a confident, fun-loving guy around her...don't even mention the whole relationship with her. Odds are that she knows that she was wrong and is looking for reasons to justify it (by you appearing insecure, she can justify that it might have worked out for the best in the long run anyway). You don't want her to be able to justify it. If you are cool and confident, she will end up feeling much worse, without you doing anything.

For an example, an old girlfriend told me that she wanted to take a break from our relationship. Instead of being all needy and stuff, I just looked at her, smiled, and said something like "sure, I think it's a great idea for us to see what else is out there". Sure enough, like a month later, she called me up and practically begged me to get back together with her. A few months later, we decided to end the relationship, and instead of just being cool with it, I started asking questions and saying that I wanted to find a girl that appreciated me and stuff. After this, she was never attracted to me again, and everything has been weird since.

By not asking questions, acting like you care, etc. it shows that you are a confident guy who knows he deserves a great girl and has plenty of options. Girls see through the words coming out of your mouth...they see your intentions...your true character when the times get tough. When you can handle a situation like this in a truly confident manner, she will know that she let a great guy get away.

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little fella;294820 said:

Do your best to stay away from that dick head. I think that you have a lot off thoughts running through your mind at the moment and all that is going to happen is when you see him they are all going to come puring out and who knows what could possibly happen as you said you have spurts of anger and if you see him these spurts could turn into pure rage. You honestly sound like you are a smart guy with a good head on his shoulders I am sure that there are many woman out there that would kill to have a guy like you keep your head up as you said time heals and that is what you need at the moment time to chill out. Can I ask what do your mates think about this?

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10inchadvantage;294834 said:

Ya that's a good point. I know she'll be calling in about a week. When she does I was thinking of just saying, "Look, I'm done with you. Stop calling. Bye." Do you have a better suggestion?

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10inchadvantage;294836 said:

My buddies (a lot of which are in the frat the guy is in) think it's fucked up what they both did. Turns out the guy is pretty scared. He called my roommate (on social chair with him) and told him he needed to talk with him. So the guy is running high already. Doesn't mean I'm not going to be an asshole to him.

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Reber187;294852 said:

10inch sorry to hear you've been fucked over like this.

what you must do is knock his cunt in so your emotions leave a visual mark. don't think about it just do it. talk with your fists.
this cheeky arsehole has requested to talk to you... about what?! how he fucked your woman and how he's really really sorry... knock the cunt out of him!

there is only one answer here. do the right thing friend.


keep pushing

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atlyroc;294912 said:

dude honestly i c u kinda young, but as for forgiving them and stuff thats cool, but you have no reason to talk or communicate with them. you shouldnt even let them know u thinkin about them. if you have convenced your self you happy then just go be happy and talk no more about. you have gotten good advice from everyone here you no what do do and that is live your life and be succesful and happy.

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10inchadvantage;294922 said:

I've got things under control and am creating my reality around what I want (at the same time doing so spiritually), not others. Thanks.

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tyandhisrod;294935 said:

it's not the guy who slept with her who should get his ass kicked. put yourself in his position...some guys hot-ass girlfriend is making the moves on you and she's willing to fuck you? i know i'd go for it. She's the bitch, not him. he was taking advantage of a good situation...leave that bitch and forgive him...or ignore him. bottom line, not his fault.

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10inchadvantage;294882 said:

Well. I went out with my best friend tonight somewhere off Loop 360 and meditated for a while. I came to the realization that to truly be happy and spread the Divine Love everywhere I just truly needed to forgive both of them. I did so (haven't in person yet) and I feel so free. What is done is done. I'm not taking her back due to emotional scaring. However, I still have the Love for her that I did beforehand. It's just that due to the fragile circumstance I can no longer sleep or really see her for a long time. I'm excited to meet women whom I really connect with on another level. The ego is never satisfied. Spirit simply IS.

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tyandhisrod;294935 said:

it's not the guy who slept with her who should get his ass kicked. put yourself in his position...some guys hot-ass girlfriend is making the moves on you and she's willing to fuck you? i know i'd go for it. She's the bitch, not him. he was taking advantage of a good situation...leave that bitch and forgive him...or ignore him. bottom line, not his fault.

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atlyroc;294926 said:

read you were from texas good man . me too

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sikdogg;294951 said:

Sounds like you're finally getting your head straight... Bro, you need to stay cool and keep things in perspective. It's better she did this now than a year from now... hear me??

Keep cool if/when you talk to her and don't let her see you upset or hurt in any way. Just tell her that everything is good betwen the two of you now and that you wish her the best with whatever she does... let her know that you're moving on and hope she does too. Tell her that if she wants to be friends that you're cool with that and if she doesn't, then that's cool too. Keep the conversation short and tell her that you're meeting up with friends and have to run. If she ever calls you, pick up but after a minute or so tell her that you're with someone right now and can't really talk but you'll call her later... never call her back. If she sees that she hurt you then she wins... what you need to do is show her that you have a life without her and don't need her at all. If you do this, she WILL want you back and the power shift back to you. YOU get to decide her fate not her deciding yours.

As for the guy she screwed... he doesn't really matter cuz if it wasn't him she would have just found someone else. But since he was your friend, i would talk to him and tell him that whatever happened between your girl and him is between them and if he still wants her... he can have her. Tell him that what he did was fucked up and totally disrespected your friendship, as friends just don't do that to friends. Since he felt it necessary to do that to you... he ended your friendship, not you. Tell him that you don't plan on starting any shit between the two of you but if he ever crosses you again for any reason, you will treat him like an enemy. Remember to always keep your head straight and never let any of them know that got to you or that they've hurt you. Show them that you're in control and you're goot to go... peace bro.

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