Female orgasm problem

This is no hypothetical situation, it's my roomate. He has been seeing this girl for a few months now, and their biding their time for sex. He just recently discovered (she told him) that she can't orgasm, or at least never has in the past, and shes slept consistently with 10 past boyfriends. This obviously bugs him and I would like to help. Any advise?

bIgjOe said:

This is no hypothetical situation, it's my roomate. He has been seeing this girl for a few months now, and their biding their time for sex. He just recently discovered (she told him) that she can't orgasm, or at least never has in the past, and shes slept consistently with 10 past boyfriends. This obviously bugs him and I would like to help. Any advise?

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Buy the Hitachi "magic wand" on ebay. You can get it there new for as low as $26 + $8-$9 shipping. (Retails at $65 and up locally)

The Magic Wand is a handheld massager. I guarantee that she will come within 10 minutes if that is put on her clit. My wife is usually slow to orgasm, but can get one in 2 minutes flat with the Magic Wand. Yes, he can lick her clit, etc. - but believe me - this is much faster and she will come HARDER with the massager. My advice is to maintain verbal communication with the girl while she's using the device or she will come too quickly and sex will be over for your friend. It works damn fast. He should probably ask her when she is close and then take away the massager and stick his dick in. One way that he could use the massager at the same time is to screw her doggie style while she holds the device on her clit. A little awkward, but it works great and feels great to the woman.

IMO - It's important that the girl have some sensitivity in her vagina so that she makes some kind of noise during intercourse. That let's your friend know that she is enjoying things. If I were your friend, I'd test out the sex with the gf to see how things are. If she's really low in the libido dept. and it bothers him, he will have invested less time in the relationship.
In my mind, she's already warning him up front that things are going to suck, so I'd be looking elsewhere (before he ends up long-term with her and is miserable).

bIgjOe said:

This is no hypothetical situation, it's my roomate. He has been seeing this girl for a few months now, and their biding their time for sex. He just recently discovered (she told him) that she can't orgasm, or at least never has in the past, and shes slept consistently with 10 past boyfriends. This obviously bugs him and I would like to help. Any advise?

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this friend wouldn't be you would it? ha, i mean what can you do, tell him to go down on her and figure out what she likes, 99% of chicks will get of best from oral.

Where does she live, i'd be willing to offer my services as a sex surrogate. If she at all capable of an orgasm, i'll bring it out of her... lol

Shithead said:

this friend wouldn't be you would it? ha, i mean what can you do, tell him to go down on her and figure out what she likes, 99% of chicks will get of best from oral.

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not necessarily 99%. i get the best from penetration, not oral. some girls are different with that, some won't get anything from either at all sometimes. juss try different things out. vibrators, dildos, anything.

Yep, all women are different in my experience. Some get off from only oral like my ex wife, some get off from oral and vaginal, some get off when you finger their butt, some only get off from vaginal like my last g/f.

...shes slept consistently with 10 past boyfriends. This obviously bugs...

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Itd bug me if my girl consistantly slept with her last 10 boyfriends.... itd bug me, at my age at least, if she even had 10 boyfriends in the past lol.

sephin said:

Itd bug me if my girl consistantly slept with her last 10 boyfriends.... itd bug me, at my age at least, if she even had 10 boyfriends in the past lol.

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See, things like that no longer bug me now that I've matured more mentally about adult relationships. I'm only concerned with the here and now. If a girl's with ME, that's all I care about. As long as she's faithfull to me only, has no STD's, and doesnt constantly talk about her ex/exes, it's all I'm concerned with. I've been with 13+ women by now. Each woman is a new experience. The past is the past....as long as the past is the past with her.

That's a great attitude SWM... dwelling on her past BF's is just plain insecurity. There's nothing you can do about a person's past - only their future. Enjoy the time you spend with your girl or dump her, either way get over her past and move forward...

yeah exactly. SHE'S going home with YOU. that's all that matters.

unless she has some sort of disease then you gotta problem

Ditto. Worrying about old boyfriends is a sign of immaturity. As you get older, it will be just like Still said. The past is the past. About the orgasm thing...experiment, experiment, experiment. There is no magic key. My wife gets off best vaginally, with me going fast and deep. She sometimes gets off from fingering. She doesn't care for me going down on her so much, but I have been able to get her off a couple times just working her boobs. The best thing to do is have fun, not worry about it too much, don't put any pressure on her to cum and do what she likes. She will get comfortable and let herself go eventually.

Hmmm...not to hi-jack or anything, but you ppl are saying that even if your girl/guy slept with lets say...more than 50 people, and they still have no diseases, you still wont care because the past is the past? What about if they did have an STD(s) but they were cured from the STD(s), then what?

So what if they had an STD in the past?!? if they don't have it now, why sweat it??

aares said:

Hmmm...not to hi-jack or anything, but you ppl are saying that even if your girl/guy slept with lets say...more than 50 people, and they still have no diseases, you still wont care because the past is the past? What about if they did have an STD(s) but they were cured from the STD(s), then what?

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insecurities and STD's are two completely different topics.

True shithead, I was just adding the STD part because kittie said it would be a different story if STD's were involved. I dont know, I just wouldnt be with someone if she had an STD in the past, even if it was cured. It just makes me sick...I wouldnt be able to make myself do anything sexual with her if she had an STD.

Hey at least the girl didn't orgasm from the past 10 dudes...

aares said:

True shithead, I was just adding the STD part because kittie said it would be a different story if STD's were involved. I dont know, I just wouldnt be with someone if she had an STD in the past, even if it was cured. It just makes me sick...I wouldnt be able to make myself do anything sexual with her if she had an STD.

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I don't see what the problem is if she had an STD in the past. It's not like she went out and asked to contract it, it was most like contracted from an ex that didn't tell her that he had it or just didn't know he had it. I think it suck to hold that against her when it was totally out of her control.

What if the tables were turned and no chick was willing to hook up with you cuz you contracted an STD in the past even though it was cured??

^ Well maybe its the women I know or the women around my area because they all go around sleeping with a different man every week, and that is a fact. Obviously not all of them do this, but I am not exaggerating either. I can name eight different women off the top of my head within the ages of 18-24 that do this. Maybe not a different guy every week, but sometimes this is the case. Three of these women I hang out with close to every weekend, and the rest I talk to atleast once a week, sometimes longer not that it matters.

If she didnt really know that he had an STD, then no it wasnt her fault, but I still couldnt do it. I would feel like I was "infected" even though it was cured (if possible) if I had a sexual relation with her.

You most likely wont believe me, but I know what I know. My one ex-girlfriend named Brittany (dont see a problem revealing name) willingly had oral and vaginal sex with a ex-friend of mine named Jason about 7 months back, a one night ordeal. The problem with this, is that my girl at the time, another friend of mine, and I all told Brittany that Jason had herpes simplex 2, a proven fact. I cant remember her words, but basically she didnt care. She wanted dick. So she got it...along with the virus. So in short, I dont think the woman, whoever it may be would really like to admit that at the time she just wanted a fuck and didnt care about STD's. In reality, anyone could say, "oh gosh I really didnt know", when it very well could be the complete opposite, hence my short story above.

Common curable STD's are Gonorrhea, Chlamydia, and Syphilis

Common non-curable STD's are Herpes Simplex Virus 1 and 2, Viral Hepatitis: A, B, C, D and E, Genital Warts, and HIV/AIDS

Chlamydia tops the list in being the most common, and thank god it is curable.

To answer your question, I would COMPLETELY understand if a woman didnt want to be intimate with me because of an STD that I contracted, even if it was cured. Now, I cant say how many women wouldnt want to have sex with me if they knew it was cured and there was no way that they could contract it, but I would understand. I might really like/love the person, but I would understand and I would have to further explain everything to her and hopefully she would change her mind.

Som bitch I should've been hangin whilst typin dis shiat.

Well... if she knew about the STD and went ahead and had sex with him anyway, then i totally agree with you and would stay away.

If she is like most girls I know your friend won't be finding out if he can get her to orgasm if she finds out he is discussing her issues with his buds.