Cat is out of the bag... the wife knows

This is a little long so here's a summary - we're still sleeping in the same bed lol.

I wasn't sure if there's a better sub-forum for this. I think it belongs here but if not please move it.


There was no way to hide signing for the delivery of a Bathmate. She's heard me say before that I wish I was bigger (and had my foreskin) and she always says there's no need. She has never complained about my size. Well need and want are 2 different things.

I reminded her that I'm getting older (almost 40) and told her I've been doing some things to try to get back to the erections of my teenage self. She just kind of looked at me funny and I informed her how my penis ALWAYS used to look up at me with every erection and I miss that.

The conversation basically ended, or so I thought, with me saying that if the pump or anything else makes me bigger then that's great. I'm merely trying to keep everything working properly.

I'm partially in the doghouse though. I wasn't able to give the Bathmate a try until hours later (and only for a few minutes). When I did she got irritated saying it was just a toy to jerk off with and I had to inform her that this feels NOTHING like rubbing one out, it's hard intense suction and it will have zero negative effect on my sexual performance.

I did get a chance to wear it for about 15 minutes in the shower last night. I didn't tell her about it. Unfortunately we didn't go to bed until well over 30 minutes after my Bathmate session was over (I think it was 45 minutes). By that time the massive flaccid size I was toting around was starting to go away. I'm not sure how much of it was still remaining by the time we had sex. I think there was still some extra girth but not a noticeable amount.

She hasn't seen my whole stretching routine yet and since the kids are here this weekend she won't. Within the next week she's going to end up seeing me do all of it while she shakes her head at me and calls me an idiot half seriously half joking.

I've still got some work to do on her to get her fully okay with this. I didn't want to hide it from her in the first place but I was always planning on telling her. It just happened sooner than I wanted. Maybe I'll get lucky and she'll start fully supporting me on this and even help with measurements and edging. Time will tell.

But I'm still in the doghouse. Need to scrounge up some money somehow and get her flowers or something in the next few days.

Man my wife has known since day one and honestly i don't understand women getting upset about this. My wife is super supportive and laid back and when I told her she first did the same as all, she was like there's no need etc. once I emaplied I knew that but it was something I wanted and was to enhance sex for both of us she just said well I understand everyone has shit they want to change and it's no different then a woman wanting a boob job except you can do it without surgery. I've made moderate gains in my 6 months of pe and she can tell as can I. I would say kinda explain it in that way and see how things go but I really don't why so many guys have issues with this or should I say their women have the issues. Either way glad it's out in the open hopefully she can be supportive and no be mad or anything about it.

Ok, so I'm going to chime in with the way I usually answer this type of post. First, it's YOUR penis. She married you and your body. Yea, big deal, you "kept this from her". You probably could have told her about it from day one, but a guys' naturally skeptical nature has us try things first before we tell someone we are doing something new just in case it does not work. It's usually a guy ego thing, to save face.

She has a body she second guesses too, if she's a normal woman. If she wanted a face lift, tummy tuck, new breasts, whatever....you'd likely support it as her sweet, loving husband, correct? She has no right therefor to give you any grief, or criticism over trying something that will potentially make you happier with your body. You may need to swallow some pride and reassure her you are doing this 100% for you. It's not to impress anyone else, or because you secretly hope a bigger penis will bestow you with some new self confidence that will have you out on the prowl, or wanting to chase someone new. It's a sili insecurity I see brought up once in a while, but you may want to explore that with her and make sure she's not hiding some insecurity from you.

Ultimately, it is your body and you have a right to do with it what you see fit. Otherwise, you may have some relationship issues that need work. That's the honest truth.

smitty2590;726724 said:

Man my wife has known since day one and honestly i don't understand women getting upset about this. My wife is super supportive and laid back and when I told her she first did the same as all, she was like there's no need etc. once I emaplied I knew that but it was something I wanted and was to enhance sex for both of us she just said well I understand everyone has shit they want to change and it's no different then a woman wanting a boob job except you can do it without surgery. I've made moderate gains in my 6 months of pe and she can tell as can I. I would say kinda explain it in that way and see how things go but I really don't why so many guys have issues with this or should I say their women have the issues. Either way glad it's out in the open hopefully she can be supportive and no be mad or anything about it.

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Women have issues with it because they're women. I think their initial thought is "omg if he's bigger other women are going to want him and try to take him!" yet they forget that your penis is the last thing they see in the lead up to getting in bed with you. Well, in most cases at least.

I'm going to keep working at it and when there's a noticeable difference I know she'll be happy about it.

stillwantmore2;726729 said:

Ok, so I'm going to chime in with the way I usually answer this type of post. First, it's YOUR penis. She married you and your body. Yea, big deal, you "kept this from her". You probably could have told her about it from day one, but a guys' naturally skeptical nature has us try things first before we tell someone we are doing something new just in case it does not work. It's usually a guy ego thing, to save face.

She has a body she second guesses too, if she's a normal woman. If she wanted a face lift, tummy tuck, new breasts, whatever....you'd likely support it as her sweet, loving husband, correct? She has no right therefor to give you any grief, or criticism over trying something that will potentially make you happier with your body. You may need to swallow some pride and reassure her you are doing this 100% for you. It's not to impress anyone else, or because you secretly hope a bigger penis will bestow you with some new self confidence that will have you out on the prowl, or wanting to chase someone new. It's a sili insecurity I see brought up once in a while, but you may want to explore that with her and make sure she's not hiding some insecurity from you.

Ultimately, it is your body and you have a right to do with it what you see fit. Otherwise, you may have some relationship issues that need work. That's the honest truth.

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Exactly - it's MY body. She wouldn't complain if I was back in the gym 5 days a week. She's in the process of trying to lose weight and the only issue I've had is she isn't doing it in the healthiest of ways.

I'm probably due for some shit from her over it though cause I'm always giving her shit about makeup. I don't like makeup. I think it's lying about your looks. Ever watch some of the videos of self-proclaimed professional make up artists? Some of these women look hideous and 17 layers later they aren't even the same person. The end of the video is usually a link to their site for the "awesome" makeup they used. That's worse than push-up bras and high heels and padded underwear because when you wake up next to it you're going to think you fucked a clown. Yuck.

Anyway, I've told her 1735 times, roughly, that she looks better without it and she really does. I've also told her how lucky she is that she doesn't need makeup to look good whereas some of these women ONLY look good with it. So yeah, I've kinda dug a grave there and now I'm gonna catch some back. She's right, I don't need to be bigger for us to have great sex but it'll still be great if I am bigger.

I'm sure there will be further talks about it, especially when she finally sees my whole stretching routine (we're on opposite shifts so I have most mornings to myself to do it). I know all the right things to say too, I've gone over all them in my head a dozen times, she just has to understand them on her own terms. You're correct though that if there's a huge issue over it then there's bigger problems that need serious work.

Pussy would be a better word choice than cat,,,,just saying'

If you are doing foreskin restoration simultaneously, that has some serious benefits for her in sex, especially as the two of you age and her vagina changes. That could help her to see the advantage of you improving your overall penis health and wellbeing. (This could be helpful material for her to read: Circumcise or Not? How Penis Circumcision Affects Sex)

When I started foreskin restoration my wife was skeptical, primarily because she doesn't want me to permanently ruin my penis and therefore our sex life. Remember that you've done a ton of research and reading that she hasn't. It all seems obvious to you, but it might take some time before she's fully on board. Now my wife is cheering me on! I introduced PE to my routine after I had established FR and its advantages, so it was an easier sell. She is still adamant that I not wreck my penis, as she'd like to enjoy it for years, to come.

doublelongdaddy;726745 said:

Pussy would be a better word choice than cat,,,,just saying'

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I hope her pussy doesn't get away! I really like hers a lot.

I need to remind her to start doing kegels again. She's not loose, far from it, and she can squeeze pretty damn good when she wants to. When she's doing them regularly she'll squeeze and release all through sex and the way she does it blows my mind.

Bolden;726752 said:

If you are doing foreskin restoration simultaneously, that has some serious benefits for her in sex, especially as the two of you age and her vagina changes. That could help her to see the advantage of you improving your overall penis health and wellbeing. (This could be helpful material for her to read: Circumcise or Not? How Penis Circumcision Affects Sex)

When I started foreskin restoration my wife was skeptical, primarily because she doesn't want me to permanently ruin my penis and therefore our sex life. Remember that you've done a ton of research and reading that she hasn't. It all seems obvious to you, but it might take some time before she's fully on board. Now my wife is cheering me on! I introduced PE to my routine after I had established FR and its advantages, so it was an easier sell. She is still adamant that I not wreck my penis, as she'd like to enjoy it for years, to come.

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I'd love to do foreskin restoration but I'm going to focus on one thing at a time right now. I have a Price Albert piercing as well and that will probably interfere with restoration so it's a tough call. I love the piercing and don't want to lose it.

She works in nursing homes so she's seen plenty of uncut guys (usually all old men) and swears it's disgusting. After going back and forth on the subject I told her that if I had not been cut she probably wouldn't of known until AFTER we had sex a few times and she saw it. This is simply her, and the general public's, lack of knowledge and education about foreskin and circumcision.

I've looked into "cock socks" that are designed to be worn with lotion and can be worn 24/7. They're simply to restore sensitivity by protecting the glans from rubbing. I'm thinking about getting a few. Maybe I'll put it on my bday list. That should be an easy sell if I explain to her that as I get more sensitive she'll be able to make me squeal like a girl much easier during blow jobs.

After 2+ years of PE and aggressive BM usage, I'm now about 50% 'uncircumcised' and I have to admit it doesn't looks overly odd and I believe there's additional sensitivity (but the latter could also be due to my additional size which creates much more friction).

Glad to hear that your wife was reasonably understanding

women can get jealous of PE just like going to the gym. However they always want the end result, but the work that goes into it can be a deal breaker for some women.
All of the biggest penis enlargers we know about online are single or ended up single. that is no coincidence.

Well except for BIB

cladre60;726710 said:

But I'm still in the doghouse. Need to scrounge up some money somehow and get her flowers or something in the next few days.

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Literally the worst move to make, in any scenario.

You're not in "the doghouse", you're in your house. Be a fucking man and own it. Get her a huge cock, not flowers.

Big Schwanz Acht;726792 said:

After 2+ years of PE and aggressive BM usage, I'm now about 50% 'uncircumcised' and I have to admit it doesn't looks overly odd and I believe there's additional sensitivity (but the latter could also be due to my additional size which creates much more friction).

Glad to hear that your wife was reasonably understanding

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Semi-understanding. This morning she text me a pic of a homeless man's sign that said "Need money for penis enlargement surgery" and said "sorry but I couldn't help it. Made me think of you." I had to laugh. I told her that almost every man on the planet would happily take an extra inch or two of offered.

I do know this though, she won't be laughing and joking if I catch her after the workout I had this morning. Did my usual stretching and then went for the Bathmate. I wasn't watching how long I had it on and ended up wearing it for almost 40 minutes. No pain or discomfort and holy hell I wish she had been home. I was only planning on 20 minutes so looks like I need to set a timer. Hours later I'm still much fuller than normal. I really hope she's awake when I get home so I can share this

acromegaly;726804 said:

women can get jealous of PE just like going to the gym. However they always want the end result, but the work that goes into it can be a deal breaker for some women.
All of the biggest penis enlargers we know about online are single or ended up single. that is no coincidence.

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I can see how easily enlargement can become an obsession and ruin a relationship. Everything in moderation.

cladre60;726821 said:

...This morning she text me a pic of a homeless man's sign that said "Need money for penis enlargement surgery"

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Is this Thunder?

Threak-X;726826 said:

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Get him a LM or a PF so he can use that device 24/7

LONGERDICK7+;726837 said:

Get him a LM or a PF so he can use that device 24/7

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Can you imagine driving down the road and the guy's sign leaning up against something, his pants are around his ankles, and he's being instructed on how to put on and use a LM?

I'd crash my car from laughing too hard to drive straight.

seven_wants_ten;726815 said:

Literally the worst move to make, in any scenario.

You're not in "the doghouse", you're in your house. Be a fucking man and own it. Get her a huge cock, not flowers.

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I was half joking about that part. I forget things like my [near constant] sarcasm and joking tone of voice don't always translate when typed. Not your fault.

I do need to get her flowers or a Boyd's Bear or something though and not because of this. It's been a while since I have and women like those things.