Cat is out of the bag... the wife knows

cladre60;727403 said:

We've got a nosy teenager in the house so he'd probably find it before her, get freaked out, and destroy it. I had to install a combination lock on our bedroom door because of him.

I should take some pictures of his mother and I having sex and put them in places he needs to stay the hell out of. I'm sure the last thing he wants to see is pictures of his mom getting nailed by his step dad. That'll teach him to stay out of our stuff if we forget to put the lock on the door.

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Randolpho;727482 said:

Yep, too late to completely hide it now but I'd play it down. The reward is much greater when they don't have a clue. I've managed to keep it a secret from my wife for a couple years of so. Things have come out of her mouth during sex that she's never said before. And we've been together for a couple decades. By her not knowing, you can see her reactions and know its for real. If they know they'll just tell you what you want to hear. The question is...how long before she wakes up one day and says, "WTF" ?

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Threak-X;727457 said:

Yeah, I know that one... I have a friend with the same issue with her daughter. I setup several WiFi-nanny-cams throughout her house to a website and she could get it on her phone. Caught the nosy culprit (daughter), now, she's very careful about what she does around the house, doesn't dare go in her Mom's room alone anymore and stays in her own room most of the time.

But, I like DLD's idea, lock the kid in the safe when you're not home (ha-ha-ha)

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cladre60;727466 said:

A safe may work but my mind says that'll just further nosiness, like a "well what didn't they lock up?" I pulled the same shit at his age and I know if I would've found naked pictures of either parent I would have never gone in there again lol.

Last xmas I put a very nasty note in my closet that was on the sheet of cardboard hiding their xmas presents. It said something like "if you are reading this we WILL know and you can kiss your xmas goodbye and GTFO of our room!"

Dunno if either of them found it but the pile went undisturbed lol.

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doublelongdaddy;727545 said:

Start collecting silver or gold or antiques or rare books or something that needs to be locked up. Perfect reason for a safe and you can store your PE stuff too.

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cladre60;727563 said:

I know at the very least I need to get a fire proof lock box or if possible a small fire proof safe. I have a 3 ring binder that has all my most important paperwork in it (birth cert, all my USMC service records, diplomas etc) and while it's all in a safe place it needs to be in a fire proof safe place.

I should start looking for one that'll hold a Bathmate and LengthMaster cause if the place is burning down I'll want to save those too. I'd need something positive to keep me going if we lost it all in a fire lol.

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cladre60;726710 said:

This is a little long so here's a summary - we're still sleeping in the same bed lol.

I wasn't sure if there's a better sub-forum for this. I think it belongs here but if not please move it.


There was no way to hide signing for the delivery of a Bathmate. She's heard me say before that I wish I was bigger (and had my foreskin) and she always says there's no need. She has never complained about my size. Well need and want are 2 different things.

I reminded her that I'm getting older (almost 40) and told her I've been doing some things to try to get back to the erections of my teenage self. She just kind of looked at me funny and I informed her how my penis ALWAYS used to look up at me with every erection and I miss that.

The conversation basically ended, or so I thought, with me saying that if the pump or anything else makes me bigger then that's great. I'm merely trying to keep everything working properly.

I'm partially in the doghouse though. I wasn't able to give the Bathmate a try until hours later (and only for a few minutes). When I did she got irritated saying it was just a toy to jerk off with and I had to inform her that this feels NOTHING like rubbing one out, it's hard intense suction and it will have zero negative effect on my sexual performance.

I did get a chance to wear it for about 15 minutes in the shower last night. I didn't tell her about it. Unfortunately we didn't go to bed until well over 30 minutes after my Bathmate session was over (I think it was 45 minutes). By that time the massive flaccid size I was toting around was starting to go away. I'm not sure how much of it was still remaining by the time we had sex. I think there was still some extra girth but not a noticeable amount.

She hasn't seen my whole stretching routine yet and since the kids are here this weekend she won't. Within the next week she's going to end up seeing me do all of it while she shakes her head at me and calls me an idiot half seriously half joking.

I've still got some work to do on her to get her fully okay with this. I didn't want to hide it from her in the first place but I was always planning on telling her. It just happened sooner than I wanted. Maybe I'll get lucky and she'll start fully supporting me on this and even help with measurements and edging. Time will tell.

But I'm still in the doghouse. Need to scrounge up some money somehow and get her flowers or something in the next few days.

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kyomoto;727672 said:

Take before and after pictures to show her it's real.

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cladre60;726710 said:

This is a little long so here's a summary - we're still sleeping in the same bed lol.

I wasn't sure if there's a better sub-forum for this. I think it belongs here but if not please move it.


There was no way to hide signing for the delivery of a Bathmate. She's heard me say before that I wish I was bigger (and had my foreskin) and she always says there's no need. She has never complained about my size. Well need and want are 2 different things.

I reminded her that I'm getting older (almost 40) and told her I've been doing some things to try to get back to the erections of my teenage self. She just kind of looked at me funny and I informed her how my penis ALWAYS used to look up at me with every erection and I miss that.

The conversation basically ended, or so I thought, with me saying that if the pump or anything else makes me bigger then that's great. I'm merely trying to keep everything working properly.

I'm partially in the doghouse though. I wasn't able to give the Bathmate a try until hours later (and only for a few minutes). When I did she got irritated saying it was just a toy to jerk off with and I had to inform her that this feels NOTHING like rubbing one out, it's hard intense suction and it will have zero negative effect on my sexual performance.

I did get a chance to wear it for about 15 minutes in the shower last night. I didn't tell her about it. Unfortunately we didn't go to bed until well over 30 minutes after my Bathmate session was over (I think it was 45 minutes). By that time the massive flaccid size I was toting around was starting to go away. I'm not sure how much of it was still remaining by the time we had sex. I think there was still some extra girth but not a noticeable amount.

She hasn't seen my whole stretching routine yet and since the kids are here this weekend she won't. Within the next week she's going to end up seeing me do all of it while she shakes her head at me and calls me an idiot half seriously half joking.

I've still got some work to do on her to get her fully okay with this. I didn't want to hide it from her in the first place but I was always planning on telling her. It just happened sooner than I wanted. Maybe I'll get lucky and she'll start fully supporting me on this and even help with measurements and edging. Time will tell.

But I'm still in the doghouse. Need to scrounge up some money somehow and get her flowers or something in the next few days.

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bandit2010;727720 said:

LOL mine knows about what I do, hell she purchased my bathmate for me, at first she was a little against it, but after seeing the effects of the use of the bathmate, she cant get enough, I remember a time when we was lucky to have sex once a month, now it seems like a every night thing.

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bandit2010;727721 said:

I made the comment last night that, she was addicted to my dick, and she pretty much admitted it.

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bandit2010;727732 said:

well me and her have been together for 5 years, shes a little on the heavy side, and we always had a issue with me slipping out, she has a brain anyuerism which was taken care of back in November, right around the same time that she got me the bathmate, we didnt have sex for 3 months because she couldn't, but that first time we did, she noticed the difference, and now encourages me to continue, I need to add more to my routine.

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cladre60;727741 said:

Wow, 3 months. At least she's better now.

My wife has a beautiful, plump ass. I've used it as a pillow. No joke, I've taken a nap with my head on her ass. Doesn't matter if she's at her "ideal weight" of about 115, under, or over it. Her ass always has a beautiful shape.

She's white. One place she worked years ago she had a number of black and Puerto Rican female coworkers. They were always slapping and grabbing her ass and telling her how awesome it is. They were jealous of her ass. That should really say something for how nice it is.

If we try to have sex in the spoon position I can't stay inside her if there's any movement. That beautiful ass is in my way. It's the only position it happens and it sucks because it's a very intimate, close position. When we try to do it we end up in somewhat of a T shape with our heads far apart. I hate it because when I'm in her from behind I love the feeling of pressing my body into her ass. With a few more inches we could spoon and I'd be able to stay inside her. I wouldn't be all the way in obviously but we'd be able to enjoy that closeness.

I'm sure there's other positions that would benefit greatly from a few extra inches. I can't wait to get there and find out which they are.

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bandit2010;727743 said:

shes weighs 290, has no ass, but for her weight she looks good, and here recently she cant get enough, I about died laughing when she admitted she couldnt get enough of my dick the other night,

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cladre60;727762 said:

That is the only thing that matters - you think she looks good.

One of the biggest mistakes of my life was being too self conscious about someone's size. I'm 5'6". In high school my senior year we had a Dutch foreign exchange student. She was so pretty, super sweet, totally into me, but she was 6' or 6'1" and while she had all the curves of a woman they were proportionate to her height. She was close to 200lbs but she looked good. Real good.

I was so insecure over the height difference that we never went beyond being friends even though we were pretty much in love with each other. Who knows, maybe she would've stayed in the states longer or maybe I would've moved to Holland with her or maybe we just would've had a wonderful year together and that's it.

Live and learn. Who gives a shit that other people think about what makes you happy.

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