Heartbroken...

Honestly, if she is fucking dudes left and right and always drunk as much as you say, I'm pretty sure she has had a hell of allot of unprotected sex by now. And now you say she is worrying about STDs? Dude, wtf are you still trying to pursue that? Do you want to get STDs from a girl that don't give a fuck about you? You are allot safer having sex with a prostitute than a slut.

LIGHTNING;588033 said:

Honestly, if she is fucking dudes left and right and always drunk as much as you say, I'm pretty sure she has had a hell of allot of unprotected sex by now. And now you say she is worrying about STDs? Dude, wtf are you still trying to pursue that? Do you want to get STDs from a girl that don't give a fuck about you? You are allot safer having sex with a prostitute than a slut.

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The best way to get over an obsession is to replace it with another. This may not be the most therapeutic method but it damn well works. At the point you are Zam your desires are based on what is very difficult to have and this will drive a man crazy finding a way through it to get what he wants and in the rare case you do get what you want, what do you really get? A justification for your desire. This justification will last about 10 minutes until the obsession returns to attack and destroy everything you worked so hard to get and then you will be left at square one again. I know this because I accomplished this with my X-Girl Jen. She left me and was out doing everything I could not bare but my obsession over her grew more and more until it became crippling. I did whatever I had to do to get her back and when I finally did it lasted less than 3 months and those 3 months were pure hell. Letting go is hard to do but once you do you will allow the right person room to enter your life.

An additional concept I would like to put forward is maybe becoming abstinent for a while. Taking time to yourself, learning to love and appreciate all the parts of yourself that may now go ignored can be refreshing and teach a man to gain a great inner self confidence. Sometimes a mate is nothing more than a filling missing from our own personal psyche. If you learn to fill that part of yourself with self-confidence you will shine so much brighter and allow for the good to walk into your life.

LIGHTNING;588033 said:

Honestly, if she is fucking dudes left and right and always drunk as much as you say, I'm pretty sure she has had a hell of allot of unprotected sex by now. And now you say she is worrying about STDs? Dude, wtf are you still trying to pursue that? Do you want to get STDs from a girl that don't give a fuck about you? You are allot safer having sex with a prostitute than a slut.

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I agree totally. Zam; Now that I think about it; you should be looking for some younger, cleaner chick that you can control.

Disco Dave;588052 said:

I agree totally. Zam; Now that I think about it; you should be looking for some younger, cleaner chick that you can control.

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Control may be something Zam also gives up, sometimes it is ok to not be in control, sometimes a balanced, equal relationship will be exactly what a man needs. I say this from experience, women hate to be controlled and will rebel even against the things they love to escape control.

doublelongdaddy;588041 said:

The best way to get over an obsession is to replace it with another. This may not be the most therapeutic method but it damn well works.

An additional concept I would like to put forward is maybe becoming abstinent for a while. Taking time to yourself, learning to love and appreciate all the parts of yourself that may now go ignored can be refreshing and teach a man to gain a great inner self confidence. Sometimes a mate is nothing more than a filling missing from our own personal psyche. If you learn to fill that part of yourself with self-confidence you will shine so much brighter and allow for the good to walk into your life.

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Zam, this is really good stuff right here that DLD wrote.

LIGHTNING;588066 said:

Zam, this is really good stuff right here that DLD wrote.

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Zam: they may be right. But let me tell you this. You need a wholesome young chick that wants to experiment with sex the same as you do. A chick that is curious to slowly test the waters. This is why guys use to go after good persona fat chicks. Just because both parties felt comfortable while learning sexual techniques without the worries of being laughed at. Now I am not saying fuck a fat chick but you can find a young pretty chick that is insecure who just wants to experiment and possibly fall in love at the same time. So I suggest somebody that is sexy but shy. The shy ones usually dont know how sexy they are. And they are willing to experiment with the good guy. Just catch them before the Dick-head alpha male gets to them first.

dude, stop going after the drunk slutty chick. she's bad news. stop lowering your self value...pretty soon this chick is gonna take all the value/confidence you have left, and you'll be standing there a lone with nothing. good women aren't going to lower their value for you.

Zam, another thing also depends on where you are in this chapter of your life (school, new career, artist, etc). Chicks can be a big distraction in this phase of your life if you are not yet established. They can mislead you off your path and fuck up your future by making you fall in love/fussy whip you and then cheating or hating on you and having you being distracted from the bigger picture in life. I've been there and done that myself.

Well thank you everyone... AGAIN ! Your words really help me and now I can confidently say that I dont give a fuck so much. I am not sure if I even wanna have protected sex with such a disgusting whore . I will make sure to follow DLD's advice, I have read it in the book "The power of habit" recommended to me here in MOS by Asanon (thanks bro )- just poit it toward someting else, replace it, this is the easiest way . I am now MUCH better than I was before. You gave me all I needed! I am sorry for being a pussy and whining so much though . NOW Zam is about to have some good time, a good summer.

Zambrodom3;588105 said:

Well thank you everyone... AGAIN ! Your words really help me and now I can confidently say that I dont give a fuck so much. I am not sure if I even wanna have protected sex with such a disgusting whore . I will make sure to follow DLD's advice, I have read it in the book "The power of habit" recommended to me here in MOS by Asanon (thanks bro )- just poit it toward someting else, replace it, this is the easiest way . I am now MUCH better than I was before. You gave me all I needed! I am sorry for being a pussy and whining so much though . NOW Zam is about to have some good time, a good summer.

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Good to see your mind is so open!

Zam how are things going with this situation. Did any of our advice pan out?

LIGHTNING;592342 said:

Zam how are things going with this situation. Did any of our advice pan out?

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Hopefully it did as we all pretty much gave the same advise. Going to look shitty on our relationship advice resumes if something bad happened.


Zam, give us a good story!

smerc;592365 said:

Hopefully it did as we all pretty much gave the same advise. Going to look shitty on our relationship advice resumes if something bad happened.


Zam, give us a good story!

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I still think we all gave good advice from all angles, well done anyway!

Everything is now ok ! I did what I had to do, I did what was right to do! I followed your advices. Now she no longer means what she meant to me before. As hard as it was I realized that this was NOT the girl I fell in love with and this is NOT the girl that meant so much to me. No matter how much I digged in I could not find her. She is now going back to her ex boyfriend and she went back to Finland a week ago. Now that she is far away I find it MUCH easier not to think of her and just stop having feelings for her. I am THANKFUL to ALL of you for giving me the support I needed in the moment I needed it A LOT. I am no longer her slave or her bitch, now I am a free man! Of course it would take more time to forget her, but so far so good!!!

What she gave me is worth A LOT!!! She gave me motivation like no one else! She regularly fucked our manager (who had a pretty big size) and this gave me motivation like nothing else! Now I just cant wait till I go back home and get my hanger and pump to work!!!!

Cheers to all of you!!!!

Zambrodom3;592514 said:

Everything is now ok ! I did what I had to do, I did what was right to do! I followed your advices. Now she no longer means what she meant to me before. As hard as it was I realized that this was NOT the girl I fell in love with and this is NOT the girl that meant so much to me. No matter how much I digged in I could not find her. She is now going back to her ex boyfriend and she went back to Finland a week ago. Now that she is far away I find it MUCH easier not to think of her and just stop having feelings for her. I am THANKFUL to ALL of you for giving me the support I needed in the moment I needed it A LOT. I am no longer her slave or her bitch, now I am a free man! Of course it would take more time to forget her, but so far so good!!!

What she gave me is worth A LOT!!! She gave me motivation like no one else! She regularly fucked our manager (who had a pretty big size) and this gave me motivation like nothing else! Now I just cant wait till I go back home and get my hanger and pump to work!!!!

Cheers to all of you!!!!

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Good for you Zam! Everything in life is a lesson (good or bad) to make us stronger and help us grow. Move on brother, this was a lesson to prepare you for the true queen that awaits you.

LIGHTNING;592521 said:

Good for you Zam! Everything in life is a lesson (good or bad) to make us stronger and help us grow. Move on brother, this was a lesson to prepare you for the true queen that awaits you.

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So true, every bit of negative experience we go through eventually becomes positive experience in a new relationship. I would advise you not to move on so quickly into a bounce back relationship. It is good for a man to live with himself for some time to get to know yourself.

Zambrodom3;592514 said:

Everything is now ok ! I did what I had to do, I did what was right to do! I followed your advices. Now she no longer means what she meant to me before. As hard as it was I realized that this was NOT the girl I fell in love with and this is NOT the girl that meant so much to me. No matter how much I digged in I could not find her. She is now going back to her ex boyfriend and she went back to Finland a week ago. Now that she is far away I find it MUCH easier not to think of her and just stop having feelings for her. I am THANKFUL to ALL of you for giving me the support I needed in the moment I needed it A LOT. I am no longer her slave or her bitch, now I am a free man! Of course it would take more time to forget her, but so far so good!!!

What she gave me is worth A LOT!!! She gave me motivation like no one else! She regularly fucked our manager (who had a pretty big size) and this gave me motivation like nothing else! Now I just cant wait till I go back home and get my hanger and pump to work!!!!

Cheers to all of you!!!!

Click to expand...

LIGHTNING;592521 said:

Good for you Zam! Everything in life is a lesson (good or bad) to make us stronger and help us grow. Move on brother, this was a lesson to prepare you for the true queen that awaits you.

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doublelongdaddy;592528 said:

So true, every bit of negative experience we go through eventually becomes positive experience in a new relationship. I would advise you not to move on so quickly into a bounce back relationship. It is good for a man to live with himself for some time to get to know yourself.

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That's great to hear Zam that the girl has moved home and your better for it. DLD is right about a man living by himself to get to know himself better. I have been trying to do that for 20+ years, but my wife just won't move out. Lol

Zam we need you around here, so for the sake of the brotherhood can you please try to stick around for a while for the grace of the brothers that seek your guidance here at MoS?

Is it me or does it seems like the summer time always bring some visiting hoe into our lives. Its like the movie Revenge Of The Nerds. The summer break, the alpha males, the sluttish visiting hoar, and the good guy falling in love. This seems to be my life story. Wtf.

I stay safe by staying at home, doing my exercises ... Fudge, the closest I was to a girl was in Japan grinding against her nice butt in a club. I don't mind my solitude.

Anyway, enough about me, I've been reading this thread and I'm sorry for the pain Zam went through; but, as you mentioned yourself, you learned a lot and gained motivation! So, there's that good side to the not-so-good experience.
And you're still so young and already so advanced on this forum and life itself, so give credit to yourself!
Chin up high, good posture, the world is yours.

Just wanted to say good going on forward and yes, as LIGHTNING said, please stick around!
All the best to you Zam, stay strong!