penguinsfan

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Okay, for those that don't really know me too well, I don't have a great amount of experience with women. I have things in my life that make a relationship next to impossible. I consider myself very unattractive and I'm sure the lack of self-esteem radiates from me. So, I have been a romantic dud my entire life. Sexually, I probably have some issues. I can last for quite a while for a guy that seemingly gets laid on a centennial basis. Yet, I'm sure my techniques could be honed and refined.

Until last fall, I had never gone down on a woman, due to concerns about previous situations. However, I got the chance to perform oral on two women last year. I absolutely loved the new-found pleasure. I ate pussy like a champ and I could have stayed down there all night, had it not been for neck cramping. It was very well received too.

I say all that to explain my other problem. While I am completely at ease when eating pussy, I feel so ackward when using my mouth any other way. I just don't feel like I'm a very good kisser and I don't feel like I'm comfortable with working on breasts either. I just feel nervous and terrible when doing this. Do any of you guys out there just feel kinda lost or inadequate on this matter either? Any thoughts/advice? <:(
 
I suppose I should mention that most of the kissing and fooling around I've done before those last intimate encounters were during a state of mutual heavy intoxication, where you're naturally more at ease and less caring.
 
Well, I'm not the smoothest operator around, but I have found kissing/fooling around with a girl the first time is usually a bit awkward. Familiarity = comfort = smoother process- for me at least. Alcohol always helps blur these lines. As for your self-esteem issue, I know how you feel, but I am positive more women find you attractive than you think. Different women dig different guys, and for some gals, I guarantee you are their dream man. Furthermore, if these chicks knew the Penguinsfan we know here at MOS, you couldn't beat'em off with DLD's dick :D

Just keep at it bro. Nobody's perfect, but we all have redeeming qualities... and being a world champ pussy eater is really good one :)
 
i think kissing a girl for the first time is always awkward maybe even the second and third time. you never know how to put your mouth or if you should use your tongue , are my teeth, nose getting in the way etc. etc. girls in general make fell awkward.
 
First kisses can be awkward but it's one of your best opportunities to make a great impression. What you have to do is make her feel like she's the only girl in the whole world and that you're totally into her. To avoid the whole bumping of noses, teeth, and everything else, you need to be in control of the situation.

Once you're ready for the kiss, look deep into her eyes and bring one hand up to her cheek. Brush the back of you fingers lightly across her cheek and gently caress and place your palm on her cheek, hold it there as you continue to look into her eyes and bring your face to hers. Stop an inch or so from kissing her and pause for a second or two, if she doesn't pull back during this time or she comes forward to meet your kiss then your home free. She wants you bad. This kiss should be a lips only kiss (no tongue) and last about 2 seconds. Pull back a couple of inches and continue to look into her eyes, bring your other hand up to her other cheek before going back in for a second full kiss with tongue, as you're kissing take you hands from her cheeks and firmly wrap your arms around her. Be gentle and don't get too aggressive unless she kisses aggressively. Always let her set the pace and follow her lead and you'll do just fine.

I know this may sound hokey but it always works, chicks tell me that i'm a great kisser.
 
penguinsfan said:
... I feel so ackward when using my mouth any other way. I just don't feel like I'm a very good kisser and I don't feel like I'm comfortable with working on breasts either. I just feel nervous and terrible when doing this.
Working breasts can be a little tricky as some women like their breast/nipples worked really hard and others just feel pain unless you're very gentle. The key is to get feedback from her. I will usually fondle and squeeze her tits firmly, but not too hard while kissinng and nibbling her neck. Chicks love it when you bite their neck gently. Work your way down to her tits, suck/nibble her whole breast and flick your tongue across nipple. You can use teeth on her nipples but be very careful and go real easy at first. I usually move up and kiss her mouth, cheek, and neck again and tell her that i love the feel of her body. I then ask her "am i being too rough with you nipples? would you like me to go easier or harder?" she'll the tell you how she likes it and you move back down to her tits and work it some more. If she wants it harder, then bite down on her nipples harder and pull. If she really likes this she should moan loudly as you do this. I will also bite firmly on other parts of her tits and hold it, i then release and lick the area to soothe it. Continue doing this on both tits and slowly work a hand down between her legs.

You should also work your way around to her back and asscheeks kissing, nibbling, and biting along the way before actually tasting her pussy for the first time. The trick is to be smoothe as you transition from front to back and front again. My goal is always to make her cum with my fingers and mouth before ever putting my dick in her. Don't focus too much on any one area of her body and take your time. If you do this right, she'll be begging you to fuck her her brains out.
 
I remember when my old roommate and I were having this basic discussion one day and he's like "Dude, a person either knows how to kiss right or he doesn't and it'll never change." He was talking about some cute chick on campus that was supposed to be a terrible kisser, according to some guys, when he talked more about the point.
 
I believe that it depends on the person... if he's all about himself, then yes i agree. But if he's about pleasing his partner, then he will make adjustments here and there and tries to learn what his partner likes/wants. I've been with lots of chicks and by far the best kissers were the most experienced ones. For this reason i prefer experienced women to virgins any day of the week.
 
Texan said:
As for your self-esteem issue, I know how you feel, but I am positive more women find you attractive than you think. Different women dig different guys, and for some gals, I guarantee you are their dream man. Furthermore, if these chicks knew the Penguinsfan we know here at MOS, you couldn't beat'em off with DLD's dick :D

Just keep at it bro. Nobody's perfect, but we all have redeeming qualities... and being a world champ pussy eater is really good one :)

Thanks for the reassurance. I know I complain a fair amount about myself, but it helps relieve the stress about it. I figure I can either laugh or be frustrated and I try to avoid the latter.

I'm sure I have blown a couple of opportunities, if they were in fact compatible, but not too many. I can think of a couple friends or so in college I always wondered if they were attracted to me for anything more. While such a female would rarely initiate the first move, they absolutely freakout on you if it turns out they were not interested in that way. In short: Friends to more than friends almost never, ever works. I think back about a few of them now and then. One girl that was really attracted to me is doing well for herself (saw her at my old roommate's wedding in October 2003) but happily married. We enjoyed hanging out and I wasn't sure what I wanted, but we had NOTHING it common besides the fact we liked to rollerblade trails together. I was poking around on my alumni web site the other night and saw some girl I loved talking to after classes and thought was pretty cute with her e-mail listed. She appeared unmarried, unless the info was old. But I haven't seen her since fall of 1996. It's like, what would I say? I don't think "Hey, I'm still working overtime to pull-in 30K per year and teetering on filing bankruptcy, but let's get together." would cut it.

Don't get me wrong either. I know I'm not so repulsive that absolutely no one is attracted to me at all. It's not that bad. But I'm talking about women with some level of attractiveness. I've had a few instances where I was attracted to a chick and my friends didn't find her attractive, but for the most part, she's got to look decent. On some level, it's hypocritical, because I definitely can only find myself interested in women that are more attractive than me. For starters, I can't get very into a woman that is overweight and I myself am overweight. I'm 5'9" and 230 lbs. Yes, I'd like to lose anywhere from 60 lbs. to 100 lbs. but that ain't happening tomorrow. It's cool if "a few extra pounds" is truly that, but most women that would classify themselves as "a few extra pounds" are considerably overweight. When I was in college, almost thin/average/athletic girl would go out with an overweight guy. At age 30, it's a little more acceptable and girls are a little more willing to overlook it, to an extent but I probably exceed the extent by 20-30 pounds. What can I say? I just don't find myself attracted to women carrying much extra weight. At 30, I already find myself with a fraction of the sex drive I once had and I almost had ED bad enough to ruin the party once last year (which really scared me). The red hair also kills me. Only a very small percentage of women find red hair acceptable or attractive. This also eliminates any redheads from dating consideration. I resent them for the fact that men are far more attracted to redheads than women are. I also could not date a really far-left liberal.

I know it sounds like I'm really picky, but it's not as bad as it sounds. I do think I have some good personal qualities, but the reality is physical attraction is nearly always what initiates the first step, except for friends to lovers, which works out about 1% of the time. So, I don't really have any reason to be optimistic. Guess when something does manage to work out for me, I've got to have this kissing and foreplay shit resolved. :)
 
belowav said:
i think kissing a girl for the first time is always awkward maybe even the second and third time. you never know how to put your mouth or if you should use your tongue , are my teeth, nose getting in the way etc. etc. girls in general make fell awkward.

Yeah, I can remember (sorta) a couple of occasions where the kissing went smooth as silk. Then there are those times that are just uncomfortable. I kissed a couple of women within the past year or so (I never do any better than this) and both were ackward situations. The one kept kissing and kissing, but they were glorified grandma kisses, as she didn't want much tongue at all. They other was some foreign girl, so she was a little more open or blunt. She actually told me to I was using too much tongue (I really don't think I do) and I assumed she wasn't all that into me, but we managed to hook up. Then, the next night, I got a bottle of whiskey for the two of us and she began taking drinks of whiskey and sharing it during a pretty intimate kiss and having me do the same when I drank, so maybe the alcohol inspired her. ?:(

Hey belowav, I would recommend you try focusing on some of the stuff sikdogg has talked about, because he's unquestionably right about one thing: it's your best chance to make a great impression. I'm sure chicks will remember a bad kiss, even if the fuck was decent.
 
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sikdogg said:
Once you're ready for the kiss, look deep into her eyes and bring one hand up to her cheek. Brush the back of you fingers lightly across her cheek and gently caress and place your palm on her cheek, hold it there as you continue to look into her eyes and bring your face to hers. Stop an inch or so from kissing her and pause for a second or two, if she doesn't pull back during this time or she comes forward to meet your kiss then your home free. She wants you bad. This kiss should be a lips only kiss (no tongue) and last about 2 seconds. Pull back a couple of inches and continue to look into her eyes, bring your other hand up to her other cheek before going back in for a second full kiss with tongue, as you're kissing take you hands from her cheeks and firmly wrap your arms around her. Be gentle and don't get too aggressive unless she kisses aggressively. Always let her set the pace and follow her lead and you'll do just fine.

I know this may sound hokey but it always works, chicks tell me that i'm a great kisser.

Thanks dogg. I probably don't do enough of the intimate shit like the eye contact and facial touch. I mean, I know I should, but I end up not remembering how important it is when the time comes.
 
sikdogg said:
Once you're ready for the kiss, look deep into her eyes and bring one hand up to her cheek. Brush the back of you fingers lightly across her cheek and gently caress and place your palm on her cheek, hold it there as you continue to look into her eyes and bring your face to hers. Stop an inch or so from kissing her and pause for a second or two, if she doesn't pull back during this time or she comes forward to meet your kiss then your home free. She wants you bad. This kiss should be a lips only kiss (no tongue) and last about 2 seconds. Pull back a couple of inches and continue to look into her eyes, bring your other hand up to her other cheek before going back in for a second full kiss with tongue, as you're kissing take you hands from her cheeks and firmly wrap your arms around her. Be gentle and don't get too aggressive unless she kisses aggressively. Always let her set the pace and follow her lead and you'll do just fine.

that sounded like it was straight outa a cozmo magazine, ha. im not trying to pick shit, but i've always figured kissing to be a natural thing where you just go with the flow of it.

you seem to have all these romantic steps and gestures to tick off in your mind as your kissing which would kinda take the romance outa it.
 
sikdogg said:
Working breasts can be a little tricky as some women like their breast/nipples worked really hard and others just feel pain unless you're very gentle. The key is to get feedback from her. I will usually fondle and squeeze her tits firmly, but not too hard while kissinng and nibbling her neck. Chicks love it when you bite their neck gently. Work your way down to her tits, suck/nibble her whole breast and flick your tongue across nipple. You can use teeth on her nipples but be very careful and go real easy at first. I usually move up and kiss her mouth, cheek, and neck again and tell her that i love the feel of her body. I then ask her "am i being too rough with you nipples? would you like me to go easier or harder?" she'll the tell you how she likes it and you move back down to her tits and work it some more. If she wants it harder, then bite down on her nipples harder and pull. If she really likes this she should moan loudly as you do this. I will also bite firmly on other parts of her tits and hold it, i then release and lick the area to soothe it. Continue doing this on both tits and slowly work a hand down between her legs.

You should also work your way around to her back and asscheeks kissing, nibbling, and biting along the way before actually tasting her pussy for the first time. The trick is to be smoothe as you transition from front to back and front again. My goal is always to make her cum with my fingers and mouth before ever putting my dick in her. Don't focus too much on any one area of her body and take your time. If you do this right, she'll be begging you to fuck her her brains out.

Good advice. I never really think to just gently work over the breasts and ask her what she wants.

That front to back transition shit sounds like difficult work. I've never done the bite and nibble thing on the back of the body.
 
Shithead said:
that sounded like it was straight outa a cozmo magazine, ha. im not trying to pick shit, but i've always figured kissing to be a natural thing where you just go with the flow of it.

you seem to have all these romantic steps and gestures to tick off in your mind as your kissing which would kinda take the romance outa it.

Nah dude, bad kissers are more of a problem than the male community would like to admit, based on what I've read and heard. In a good situation, it does flow pretty naturally, but some guys are more nervous and uptight about everything. Sometimes I find myself able to relax and then sometimes I might be a little intimidated and uptight.
 
Shithead said:
that sounded like it was straight outa a cozmo magazine, ha. im not trying to pick shit, but i've always figured kissing to be a natural thing where you just go with the flow of it.

you seem to have all these romantic steps and gestures to tick off in your mind as your kissing which would kinda take the romance outa it.
Yea, i guess it does sound like a cosmo article, but like said it sounds a little hokey...

I, like most guys, don't need romance but chicks do. So all i'm trying to do is give them what they want so they'll give me what i want. I don't do this to get into a relationship, but to pound pussy. If romance is what sets the stage for getting pussy, then so be it.
 
penguinsfan said:
Good advice. I never really think to just gently work over the breasts and ask her what she wants.
If you're really into pleasing her, you gotta know what she wants. Best way to do that is ask.

That front to back transition shit sounds like difficult work. I've never done the bite and nibble thing on the back of the body.
It not difficult at all... you just work around her body with your mouth and gently use your hands to maneuver her into position. The last thing you want to do is start and stop everytime you change position. That just shows a lack of skill/experience. Just like when you're fucking, you should be able to transition from position to position without having to stop and pull out everytime.

Almost all chick like nibbling but some like biting, those are the wild fucks that you won't forget.
 
penguinsfan said:
Hey belowav, I would recommend you try focusing on some of the stuff sikdogg has talked about, because he's unquestionably right about one thing: it's your best chance to make a great impression. I'm sure chicks will remember a bad kiss, even if the fuck was decent.
;) I'm in no need of advice, i've had my time in the sun, unless my 11 year relationship doesnt pan put, my awakward years are far behind me.
was just lettin you know whether your handsome or not so handsome, popular or not we all have those awkward moments :)
 
sikdogg said:
Just like when you're fucking, you should be able to transition from position to position without having to stop and pull out everytime.
For simpler tasks, such as cowgirl to missionary, I'm good to go. However, I find most other transitions more difficult because some weight gain this fall has padded my fat pad and I'm not that much over 5" now. Unfortunately, it ain't that difficult for the thing to slide out when you're trying to move around and guide her and shit, when it just isn't what you want it to be (as if it could ever really be enough).
 
belowav said:
;) I'm in no need of advice, i've had my time in the sun, unless my 11 year relationship doesnt pan put, my awakward years are far behind me.
was just lettin you know whether your handsome or not so handsome, popular or not we all have those awkward moments :)

Oh, your initial post gave me the impression you had some of my problems, but it sounds like your personal life is in cruise control. Congrats.
 
penguinsfan said:
...For simpler tasks, such as cowgirl to missionary, I'm good to go. However, I find most other transitions more difficult because some weight gain this fall has padded my fat pad and I'm not that much over 5" now. Unfortunately, it ain't that difficult for the thing to slide out when you're trying to move around and guide her and shit, when it just isn't what you want it to be (as if it could ever really be enough).
I can see how the weight gain may pose a problem for you, but the trick is to use transitional positions to get to where you want to go.

For example to get from cowgirl to doggy, there are three necessary transitional positions (more if you want extend your play time). 1) From cowgirl, you bring her close to you for a kiss and roll over into missionary, 2) you get up on your knees and bring one leg across you body so she's laying on her side and fuck her sideway, 3) you continue to roll her over so she's laying on her stomach with you fucking her from top/behind, 4) then you lift up on her pelvis as you scoot back to get her hips up for doggy. Spend a few minutes on each transition, take your time so that both of you can enjoy each transitional position. Because you're changing position every few minutes, you'll be surprised how much longer you'll be able to last (make sure you're doing your cardio).

Some transitions are a little difficult and may cause you to pop out, which isn't bad. Stopping, pulling out, and telling her to get into the position you want is very weak in my opinion. Most chick have only experienced the average clumsy joe who stops and pulls out everytime they change position, once she experiences a guy like you that can move her body into different positions without ever pulling out and last for an hour at a time... she'll think you're the best fuck she's ever had.

My wife's best friend has had alot of boyfriends and thought some of them were pretty good. The first time we hooked up, she said that i was by far the best fuck ever. She was amazed how we were able to fuck in so many positions without me ever having to pull out. She also thought that we fucked longer than any of her boyfriends have in the past. She also loved the girth and now calls me thickMike.
 
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