Neo please read this letter i found on another site, It was writen by a guy with a similiar problem as yours, check alternate procedures before going under the knife.
" Don't know if this is considered associated with restoration or not. Sorry if it isn't. I am interested in restoration but it's impossible at the moment. Anyway. Someone suggested I post about my problem here, so here goes...(sorry about the length).
In May of 2004, I went to hospital to undergo a circumcision to fix a bad case of pin-hole phimosis. The phimosis wasn’t something I had since birth, it began to develop around the age of 12 (I just turned 25) and everything was normal before then. Circumcision was the absolute last thing I wanted but was told by the doctor and surgeon I saw that it was the only option. Having never had sex or a girlfriend, I figured I had to make the sacrifice in order to get on with my life. (It wasn’t until after my operation when I started searching the web for information on my bigger problem that I learned about steroidal creams and stretching exercises which I was never told about).
The circumcision did not go well at all. As it turned out a lot of the foreskin had fused to the glands on the under side of the penile head and around the outer ridge (edge of the glands closest to the shaft). I thought there may have been some sort of fusion problem on the underside and mentioned it to my surgeon in a pre-surgery consultation. He told me it was just my frenulum. I asked him if he was sure, he said yes and being a medical professional I trusted him. Obviously now I realize he barely gave it a thought.
This fusion occurs on the entire underside of the penile head, beginning at or just below the urinary hole (which has now been made a little smaller) running back to the shaft with the frenulum literally buried by the remaining foreskin. So now it’s like I’ve been partially circumcised as there is still a lot of foreskin stuck to my glands. The foreskin that remains on the underside is much worse than anyone reading this would imagine. Here the surgeon hasn’t just left the foreskin which was stuck to the glans, he seems to have taken the foreskin from the surrounding places, bundled it up and stitched it all together. My penis is completely mutilated. This lump of foreskin that hangs from the underside is huge. It’s about the same size as my penile head when soft. There’s like this double bulb.
As I mentioned the outer ridge of the glands has also been affected. Nearly all of the glands on the upper side are exposed. However in most places the foreskin has been stitched into the outer ridge of the glands instead of around them. To be honest, I’m not entirely sure if the problem with the outer ridge is due to a fusion problem or due to a poor job done by my surgeon. At my post-surgery consultations he only told me that a fusion had occurred on the other side and made no mention of any other areas. He also told me that he had to finish in a hurry because he wasn’t prepared for the fusion problem and the delay caused by that meant he had to hurry to stitch me up before I came out from under the anesthesia. (He was not prepared for it even though I told him I thought it was the case).
My surgeon said the fusion was due to BXO, though I don't think he was entirely sure. I’ve read that BXO is usually indicated by a white ring on the foreskin or white marks on the glands and I had none of this. I’ve seen two urologists since this happened. The first didn’t know and thought I should leave everything as it is (not an option for me), and the second also said he thought it was BXO.
Unfortunately, the fusion isn’t the only problem caused by this. The glands that are exposed are now left in a terrible state, discolored and scarred. This however only seemed to be the case after the glands had dried out after the “circumcision” (if you could call it a circumcision). In the days, or maybe weeks straight after the operation the exposed glands seemed fine. So after all this I’m starting to believe that seeking help and going through with this operation was the worst thing that I could have ever done.
I emailed many people about this. Few have been kind enough to reply. Of those that have done, two have said that I can’t be helped while one, Dr. Gary Alter (an American surgeon who does plastic/reconstructive surgery in this area) said in his brief response that it might be possible to cut away the skin on the underside and that he had performed such operations, but the stitching into the outer ridge could not be fixed. The thing is I’m pretty sure the surgeon stitched the foreskin into the glands on the under side too.
The second urologist I saw in person, however, believes he can cut or peel away all the fused foreskin and restore the shape of the glands but the scarring on the glands cannot be helped. With the mixed opinions I’m getting I’m not sure what to believe.
I don’t want to be told anymore that it still functions properly so everything is fine. The fact is I will absolutely never have sex in this state. So I can’t see it as functioning correctly. It seems I have to a lot of searching to do if I’m ever going to find some hope. (The truth is I have pretty much given up already. I just keep trying because I have nothing else to do before I die).
I have resorted to showering in the dark because it is far too depression to see myself naked. I can’t go anywhere where I’ll have to use a toilet other than my own. I’ve even taken to wrapping plastic wrap around the end of my penis because the feeling of the glands rubbing against my underwear makes me all too aware of my problems. It’s kind of a mental issue. I also hate the idea of my glands being exposed and losing all their feeling.
Obviously this experience has practically killed me. I just can't cope with life anymore. Circumcision was the last thing I wanted to have done but was made to think I'd have to do it if I was to ever have a normal life. Now not only have I lost my foreskin, but my penis is terribly deformed. I have to walk around feeling like my insides are
hanging out of me. I've never had sex or had a girlfriend or ever experienced love and now it seems I never will. I’m so tired of this life. I’m so tired of the misery and isolation. Worst of all I am so tired of watching my life waste away while I can’t live it. What pisses me off the most is that this started when I was 12 years old. 12 years old! I never had a chance. (sorry, felt the need to rant…)
That’s about it. I have lots of questions. Most of which I’m sure won’t have answers but I don't know if I should be asking them here being that this forum is for foreskin restoration. "
Sorry for the long post.