Good stuff, Neo. It is both A and B. I felt weird with her, as she is a friend, but more importantly, I am used to jacking it to �naked people movies� since like age 15. Even though in the past year, I have gradually cut down to almost nothing.
Since Nov, I have only jacked it to �naked people movies� thrice and masturbated without �naked people movies� maybe 10 times. I usually go 2-3 weeks then wack off a few times in 1-2 days then stop again.
I wonder if just never jacking off again is an answer? My penis seems to be used to the feel of my hand and reliant on it to stay hard.
Even more, I have to see genitals to get and stay aroused. that's why missionary has always been a problem. I enjoy watching mine go in and out of hers. The feel alone is not enough, because it doesn't feel all so great. Sex is supposed to be the best feeling in the world, but I could list loads of things that feel better to me.
Sex seems more like work than anything. A task. I remember it being good in the past, but like I said, my mind has become a lot more dysfunctional since.
I think the way you described your use of cialis is a good idea. I just would be afraid to become reliant on it. But I can see how using it like training wheels can work.
I think it probably is a mental thing. I wake up with erections all night and can get erect on my own. It just seems like I start thinking about the act during the act, how ridiculous it is, then I feel my penis bend, and it is all over from there. Not really sure how people do it, but then again, I'm not sure how anybody does anything.
It's frustrating that I was better at it when I was a filthy addict, even though I was terrible in comparison to anyone else. Maybe I just need to find a smoking hot cockslut to try it out on and see if I have the same response. Which will be difficult.
It's a shame all the �naked people movies� I've watched. Definitely have been desensitized. I wonder if that ever wears off? I remember when I was young, I'd get erect for a year just from the thought of cleavage or tight pants. Now I need to see smoking hot girls squirting from huge cocks just to ejaculate. And I can't afford that.
