Mind over matter.

D

DMcC

0
Body-Dimorphic-Syndrome;

If the penis was relative to body proportions, would this be normal? Some may say its small man syndrome. What ever the physiological disorder I might have the quest to be bigger has been my life obsession. I was 15 years old when I made my first [words=https://officialhydromaxpump.com/?uid=6&oid=2&affid=98]penis pump[/words], tried hanging weights and cock rings. I have no idea how I new about this stuff I just experimented and learn along the way.
I’m now 26 and still not happy. I shouldn’t say that I’m happy, I just still feel small. I was a late bloomer and short until about age 15, I’m no giant now a modest 5’7”. Over the years I’ve tried a lot of things to make my penis bigger because, I thought it always looked small compared to the rest of my body.
Now the saying goes if someone has a big penis they will let you know first. I’ve had girls and guys comment on the size of my penis and always good things because I’m over the average. I hang flaccid 6-7” and erect 7-8” BP averaging 5-6” girth. I’ve been adventures and shy about my penis in public, this is the weird part. I’ve played sports showed in change rooms, public places; skinny dipped and flashed people care free. Over the years my attitude has changed and I’m now scared to show it off, feeling more and more insecure.
The times when I feel the most concerned about it is when someone is suspect of my size and have sought opportunities to “take a peek”. If it’s a girl looking at my crouch I don’t care and it’s a turn on knowing they are looking, however guys and not the gay one because even them I don’t care; its co-workers and friends.
Here are some examples:

- I was staying at a buddy’s house and in the morning he burst in the room on me knowing I was in the nude just to get a look.
- A supervisor a work comes in to the bath room when I’m trying to take a piss and starts talking to me and staring at my dick. So I’m standing there like an idiot and can’t piss because he’s standing next to me watching.
- Another time a co-worker is telling me that my girl friend must be bragging to her girl friends about me because he had noticed how I was hanging in the shower.

So when these things happen to me I start thinking about looking to small or to big, I just don’t feel comfortable about talking face to face about the size of my dick. I still think it looks small and get the feeling like George Costanza when he goes swimming in the cold pool. I know it’s mostly in my head and I like Penis Enlargement but it’s moving out of my private life and into the spot light then I get stage fright.
This could be a chicken soup posting or if people could give advice how to go about being confident in there penis in public. Trying to take a leek when someone is in your personal space, if you have advice on that too I’ll take it.
 
I can relate to almost eveything you say. Really we are quite alike, I am keen to see the replys. Thanks for posting.

Colt
 
I have suffered with this issue for most of my sexual life. Growing up I was a very thin boy and my penis grew very early. I was always poked fun at about the size of my penis being too big. Even though I only grew to 6.5" I grew to that size at an early age. Even into my 30's I was always commented on how large my penis was, something that further influenced my beliefs that average size was in and around the 5" mark. I was extremely sexuality active from an early age and out of the more than 100 women I have been with only one said she was with someone larger (not including Jennifer). It was only after I met Jen that I became insecure about my size as she was with more men than I was women and she said that 2 men were bigger than my size, about 8.5" according to her,furthering my beliefs on average size BUT it also created a perceived defect in the way I saw myself. I know that my BDD (body dysmorphic disease) manifested itself from ego. Hearing that my penis was large my entire life and then hearing there were guys as big as me really through me for a loop. Up until this point the only large penis I saw that was bigger than my own (much bigger:)) was John Holmes. I saw his penis in a porno and I was floored but I was easy to accept this because every other penis I saw in adult entertainment was my size or there about so I believed that I must be pretty big. Later in life when I met Jen I was blown away that there were men bigger than me in the real world and my ego took a massive dive. This is one of the massive influences of my quest into Penis Enlargement. I needed to be the biggest, the best, the everything to her but ironically this is what sent her packing in the end. After 3 years of work on myself that I was able to come to grips with my disorder. I have wrote on this issue for more than 7 years but it was not until she was gone that I was able to conquer it. I realized that the obsession with my size was further fueled by my extensive involvement in Penis Enlargement. I needed to stop Penis Enlargement and distance myself completely from Penis Enlargement to starve the monster that had manifested a total path of destruction.

BDD is very much like any other obsessive, spectrum disorder and it's seemingly innocent beginnings happen from a single thought or event. It is the constant revisitation to the thought that creates the disorder. Think about it like a thin, stray dog that shows up at your front door. At first it seems very innocent and you feed it (very much like a event that begins the thought processes of BDD or OCD.) the dog will return more and more and with each feeding he will become larger and larger. It will get to a point that the dog becomes so large and powerful that his feedings are no longer gratuitous, they become a demand. The demand holds the feeder in a fear that keeps the cycle going. Eventually the feeder believes that if he just feeds the dog as soon as he shows up the dog will not scare him anymore but this is not what happens. The dog will come more often until he is there almost always with his mouth open and the one feeding the dog is doing nothing but dumping food into his mouth 24/7. This process in the mind through disorders like BDD will continue and grow until the person is in complete bondage and every part of his life is paralyzed. The only way to get the dog to leave is by starving it. Now, keep in mind that the dog may never leave BUT he will becomes so weak and frail that his bark no longer scares the feeder.

We can never expel the demons of our past completely, we can only hope to include them in the betterment of ourselves and the loved ones around us.
 
I was amazed to see when I got home from work that my post had been personally replied too by DLD. Thank you for your words of insight. I had never looked at it with that type of analogy before.
I tried not to set length or girth goals just what looked big in the mirror however, my reflection never measure up. Over the years I know I’ve gained but being so close to the to the final product I saw the same penis I started with.
I’ve searched all ends of the web looking for what works, try just about everything and spent too much time and money on finding the Holy Grail. The idea of going under the knife had crossed my mind more then once but knew that was too high of a risk I was willing to take.

Go cold turkey? Or build to the ideal and maintain gains?
 
Last edited:
DMcC;307295 said:
I was amazed to see when I got home from work that my post had been personally replied too by DLD. Thank you for your words of insight. I had never looked at it with that type of analogy before.
I tried not to set length or girth goals just what looked big in the mirror however, my reflection never measure up. Over the years I know I’ve gained but being so close to the to the final product I saw the same penis I started with.
I’ve searched all ends of the web looking for what works, try just about everything and spent too much time and money on finding the Holy Grail. The idea of going under the knife had crossed my mind more then once but knew that was too high of a risk I was willing to take.

Go cold turkey? Or build to the ideal and maintain gains?
Click to expand...

Here are some of my work on the subject among some other helpful links:

Mental Penis Enlargement Threads​

 
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