Required Reading:
Article 1 (bondjamesbond) said:
Since today is Labour Day, I think a few words might be in order regarding the pathetic lack of effort some of you (and you know who you are) are guilty of where it concerns meeting new women.
You say you want to meet girls. OK. But how hard do you try? I mean really try? I believe some of you approach maybe one to two girls a month, get blown off, get discouraged, go home and pout about it, then beat your meat. Do you honestly expect any success for being so lazy?
People that are good at things are dedicated to being the best. They're constantly looking for improvements. Take Tiger Woods.... Do you think he just got up one day and discovered that he had a great golf swing? Not hardly! The kid eats, drinks, and sleeps golf. He hits over a thousand balls a day in practice. His dedication has paid off.... He's the best there is! Eddie Van Halen once told someone that he went to bed with his guitar so he could start playing it as soon as he woke up. I could go on and on, but I think you get the drift.
Meeting women is no different; it takes work, dedication, and patience to get results.
Most of you don't want to disrupt your "balance". You get up, go to work/school, come home, get on the PC or watch TV, eat some dinner, go for a stroll at a mall, never approach anybody, go back home, get a shower, then go to bed with Miss Rosey Palm.
Does this sound like you? If so, then don't complain about being so alone. It's your own fault!
There was a time during my twenties when I approached over one hundred women a month! I didn't spend my spare time doing nothing, I wouldn't go to one store a day, I'd go to thirty! I loved it! Every second of it! Hell, even getting blown off was fun, as I'd get with my buddies later and swap "war stories" with them. We'd laugh our as*es off!
I loved going out with / banging multiple chicks at the same time. I think all young guys should. When I met my (future) wife I was seeing something like six different girls!
Unless you live in some remote wilderness, you have no excuse. Available women aren't going to come to your door, you have to get out there and find them!
Remember guys, someday a nursing home attendant is going to have to help you get up to take a pi*s so go have a blast while you're young!!
Article 2 (9Breaker) said:
By now you will have heard that confidence is the single most important thing you need when you try to meet and keep a woman. You have heard it over and over, but you cannot find it in yourself. You are puzzled, and then you become sad. The one thing everyone says you need, you can't find. You know you need it. You scream out "Where can I find my confidence?!" Is it behind the fridge? Did I leave it on the bus?
You are asking the wrong questions.
What is confidence? It is a belief in yourself that you are capable of doing what you want or need to do. It is tightly tied with self-esteem and self-worth.
Now you know what it is, you can ask the big question you must have answered. "How do I get it?"
Confidence is an attractive trait to have, but many people doubt themselves. They think to themselves "I can't get confidence. I can't do anything right." They become less and less familiar with confidence and lose sight of the big picture. They think negative. If they can think positive then they can feel better about themselves, but their minds tell them they have no good things to think about, and that they never will. If these people try hard they can think of good things they have done in the past when they were very happy, and start to think positive. Then they begin to have faith in themselves, and they slowly gain confidence. finally they have a chance to go out and make more good things happen to themselves and feel even better and even more confident. Once you start to feel confident you have to use it straight away, or it will disappear before you can benefit from it.
Some people can't do it. They try and try, but can't find any happy memories. They begin to ask if there's another way - they ask "Do we need confidence? I've never been happy with myself!" There is another way to do it. These people can try to stop worrying about their bad memories, and not worry about trying to find a woman to have all their fun with. These people only need to have fun. They need to make themselves happy. A fun person is also attractive to other people. They may not be confident, but they are having fun. They get happy experiences. They can think positive. All of a sudden, they realise they have happy memories, and can think positive, and can get their confidence!!
What sort of a person are YOU? If you are not confident in yourself, you can MAKE yourself confident. NOBODY ELSE CAN MAKE YOU CONFIDENT. YOU MUST DO IT ON YOUR OWN. When you try to do it, you have already started to win.
Article 3 (Surfboard) said:
I always hear people saying, "make eye contact," or "look into her eyes." My question was always...WHY? What good does it do? I'd hear things like, "it shows her you're confident," or "the eyes are the window to the soul." OK.... whatever that's supposed to mean. So, I pretty much didn't consider eye contact that big of a deal.
Then one day I found this article and my question was finally answered.
Eye Contact:
Direct eye contact triggers a primitive part of the human brain. Unrelenting eye contact creates a highly emotional state similar to fear.
When you look directly and potently into a woman's eyes, her body produces chemicals like phenyl ethylamine, or Penis EnlargementA, that jolts the sensation of being in love.
To give the woman the subliminal sense that the two of you are already in love, dramatically increase your eye contact while the two of you are talking.
Push it up to 75 percent of the time or more if you want to get the Penis EnlargementA gushing through her veins.
Test time:
This sounded pretty interesting to me, so it was time to put it to the test.
So, one night I head out to the local strip club. I told myself that I would hold constant eye contact with one of the girls during a table dance.
The first couple of dancers wouldn't hold eye contact with me. Maybe they were just shy or something. Then I finally got one who held it with me throughout the whole song.
Other than a nice body, I had no interest in this girl at all. About half way through the song, I start getting butterflies inside of my stomach. I don't know what effect it had on her, but by the end of the song, I felt a sense of being in love with her.
I'M NOW CONVINCED!!
So, get out there and focus on this eye contact. I know it's hard, but force yourself to hold eye contact for 75% of your conversation.
Also, give her a slight smile and a little head tilt. This way she won't get all freaked out by you. She'll get the feeling that you're truly interested in her.
Article 4 (takenodirt) said:
One of the most difficult things to do is to make good eye contact with women. (Natural shyness is the reason. Also, we've been told that staring at someone is considered rude.) We tend to make fleeting eye-to-eye contact and then we glance away or look down.
Here's a way to make consistent contact with her eyes. Start at the very top of her head. When she looks at you, move your eyes quickly downward and lock gaze with her. When she looks away momentarily, bring your head right up to her top of head level.
When she looks into your eyes again, you swiftly lower your eyes once more to connect with her eyes. In other words, your eyes are scanning from the top of her head to her eye level and back to the top of her head.
To complement eye-to-eye contact, you could say to her "You know what? I've been noticing and admiring your wonderfully done hairstyle. You did a splendid job there." She will smile and blush.
Assignments
Exercise 1:
In two separate outings, each lasting one hour in length, you will go about establishing eye contact with strangers.
A fun way to go about doing this is to walk around in a mall or in a park and look people directly in the eyes as they are walking towards you. You will find that most people will not look at you in the eyes, but for those who do look you in the eye, you will want to practice looking in their eyes at least one second longer than they look into yours, this denotes confidence. To create the impression that you are friendly and approachable, you will want to match the eye contact with a genuine smile.
You can practice eye contact on just about anyone you see, male or female, young or old. But since the eventual goal of this Boot Camp is to acquire women, you will want to spend at least some of your time establishing eye contact with attractive girls.
Exercise 2:
A confident person has no problem saying Hi to a stranger, and since the first part of this Boot Camp is geared toward building confidence, the goal of this exercise is to go around and say Hi or Hello to a total of 50 strangers during this week. Again, you can say Hi to any person you see, but since eventually your goal will be to get girls, you will want to practice saying Hi to attractive girls. Also, when greeting strangers, practice doing so with a smile and have fun.
And to save time, feel free to combine exercises 1 and 2 together, so that you can go about greeting your 50 strangers during your eye contact outings (e.g. Establish eye contact, smile, and say Hi when you are within speaking range).
After completing this exercise (no later than July 31 - one week from today), post your results on the response thread (link at the top of the lesson). Share with the rest of us anything interesting that happened, and what emotions you may have felt (excitement, nervousness, joy, etc.), as well as what you thought of this first lesson.
Good Luck and HAVE FUN!
