But I love her and cant really see myself with a different girl...
That's sweet and noble, and you're a great guy for caring towards a single someone that way ... and I wish that's how the world worked ... but an aspect of this might be why she undervalues you enough to keep leaving, despite all the things you bring to the table that win her back.
If she knows you're always going to be around, handy, pining for her, then she will take you for granted. It's the commodity theory of pairing and almost everyone is like that. (Maybe even yourself in the opposite way for wanting her, think about that one.)
A man that can have anyone (or at least carries himself through the world in such a way) -- has options. That means he doesn't have to take someone's crap -- because he knows another fish is in the sea five time a day - every day.
For genetic (and also somewhat for social) reasons ...
Guys like attractive bodies.
Girls like attractive (strong) personalities. And it sounds like you might be presenting her with a stage-door-johhny version of yourself that demands no, and therefore earns no, respect.
If you -must have her- to make your life complete, while that's super romantic in a Hollywood sort of way ... it's really weak in a genetic and social sort of way. This all might not click in a brief post ... but you're the MAN. Your life should be super together or at least seem that way - and any woman that you decide to let tag along (not beg to be with) should be a compliment to where you want to be in life, rather than a drag on your entire life.
Alter your 'inner-game' and personal comfort with your own self and where you want to be and go ...until that's -who-you-are. Then other things fall into place without having to chase and beg them.
Without options or the understanding of them, people want to -cling- to whatever blundered through their life ... as if -it- is the only Love they will ever find and without it they will die.
With options, or the understanding of them, you realize that isn't true. That Love is all around, and usually with someone who is a better fit. Don't mistake false things for real ones. High energy relationships fail -- because there is a big difference between turmoil, and actual Passion, ... between wanting ... and Belonging, ... between chaos and Love.
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