There are a couple of girls I’ve seen that I’d like to talk to but I just don’t know how to really. Thing is I just don’t give off a confident attractive vibe that girls will be attracted to and want to talk to again, I guess I’m just very ordinary in that sense so that’s why I don’t really bother anymore. (Yes being negative isn’t attractive I know)
Stripeee;741784 said:
The quote that comes to mind is from Road House, Be Nice. No matter the woman, big, small, beauty queen or anything else, be nice but don't let on that you are trying to score some ass and you might be surprised what falls at your doorstep. Self confidence will go a long way but you are the only one that can change that. I would not have considered myself Mr GQ either but it did not stop me from trying to hook up with any girl
Big Schwanz Acht
@Big Schwanz Acht
Lookn4girth;741785 said:
Great advice...I'd also add to just be extraordinary in your mind and it will permeate out your pores. Give yourself some credit, most guys sit on their ass and do less than nothing, you're improving yourself and have value in who you are and what you're becoming...let that guy out for the world to see/admire
Big Schwanz Acht;741790 said:
Well said sir
Stripeee;741873 said:
Like Nike, just do it. Don't think about it too hard just put yourself out there and see what happens. Rejection is part of the game but you have to use it to hone your skills and no matter what, don't let the rejection get you down. It is like gambling in a way, you put it out there enough, the odds will pay off eventually
Big Schwanz Acht
@Big Schwanz Acht
the more positive you see and feel about yourself, the more people will feel it...it's real
Big Schwanz Acht;741886 said:
So true. When I was coming up in Catholicism I was told I am a dirty worm, worthless and I needed see this in myself to Love God the right way! What a freaking joke! When I became a born again Christian I was told the complete opposite. When I was Catholic I hated myself and everyone around me saw in me that way. When I finally was able to cut all religion out of my mind and accept the Word of God as the Bible says (NOT MAN!) I realized I am a worthwhile child of God and that I should let my light shine bright so the whole world could see! I am a accepted, beautiful and righteous in the Love of God. Today I shine bright for all to see and that is what I project, a man who is worthwhile and loved! So many people come up to me now asking how I found such happiness so Big you are right, the world will notice.
Big Schwanz Acht
@Big Schwanz Acht
So true...Catholic School all the way to College, but it never sunk-in for me. I basically doodled or day-dreamed my way through it. Each year thereafter has been a positive progression (with a few stumbles here/there). Fortunately I'm always learning/searching and found [words=http://www.mattersofsize.com/join-now.html]MOS[/words] almost 3 years ago...this has been a huge leap in personal development and a couple years ago I discovered The Rational Male which truly put male/female dynamics into perspective for me.
My Mantra: always have something to look forward to (which prevents regret from looking backward)
My Mantra: always have something to look forward to (which prevents regret from looking backward)
Stripeee;742085 said:
Just remember, as stated by many others, PE is a marathon, not a sprint. I have found that if you will not focus on the end result but embrace the journey you will come out the other side golden
Stripeee;742213 said:
Having knowledge of the end of the journey would only lead to more stress, just enjoy the ride
Happy new year to all the brothers. Now is the time to update this thread and unfortunalty it is not going to be a happy update. Over the Christmas period I have been talking to the dream girl from a long time ago, we have been talking very regularly and even met up. I really have begun to feel like this second chance is going to come true! But on the 1st of January 2018 this little dream smashes beyond repair I think. On the 31st I spent the evening with her and her friends in a pub and eventually club in our town. Things seemed great until 03:00 on the 1st of the new year. I heard from her friends in a local takeaway food shop that she had gone home with another guy. I walked past her house as it is near mine and saw her light was on. I knock on the door twice and eventually she answers, she seems confused and says she is tired and hungover and just needs to sleep. She also says she really likes talking to me after I subtly mention (while acting a little drunk) that her friends claimed she has taken a guy home, she denies this and wants to see me again soon. I know this is a 100% lie! For multiple reasons. 1) I walked around the block and saw her light still on nearly 30 minutes later. 2)(more significant the 1!) I know the guy and messaged him where he disappeared to after the night out, after a couple of Qs admitted he went to a girls house 3) she messaged me later saying she didn’t like my snapchat (which was a honey trap) around an hour after I left hers so she couldn’t have been that tired!
I’ve been lied to by a girl i thought was so genuine and honest, now I know I’ll get responses saying you aren’t in a relationship so who cares, but this girl is special to me as she was my 1st and the only girl who’s ever truly been interested in me and not just attention. I feel so stupid thinking she might actually still have feelings for me and want to rekindle a former romance. I poured my heart out to a very cold, cynical but realistic friend and he said make her feel guilty, ignore her messages, and make her almost hate herself for treating me that way and want to try and make things up to me. Whatever she has to say I’m not particularly interested in as she said the previous day she didn’t feel like meeting as she was basically on her period! Another lie!
I feel so angry, betrayed and upset right now by her that I don’t think I want to know her anymore! Which is a scary thought as I adore this girl. I had not seen her for 3 years but when I met up with her it felt just perfect being with her. But unfortunately I think she has just become a bad fish in a sea where many of the fish are toxic and therefore a bad catch. I just don’t know how I can try to move things forward with her and that’s what truly breaks my heart.
I’ve been lied to by a girl i thought was so genuine and honest, now I know I’ll get responses saying you aren’t in a relationship so who cares, but this girl is special to me as she was my 1st and the only girl who’s ever truly been interested in me and not just attention. I feel so stupid thinking she might actually still have feelings for me and want to rekindle a former romance. I poured my heart out to a very cold, cynical but realistic friend and he said make her feel guilty, ignore her messages, and make her almost hate herself for treating me that way and want to try and make things up to me. Whatever she has to say I’m not particularly interested in as she said the previous day she didn’t feel like meeting as she was basically on her period! Another lie!
I feel so angry, betrayed and upset right now by her that I don’t think I want to know her anymore! Which is a scary thought as I adore this girl. I had not seen her for 3 years but when I met up with her it felt just perfect being with her. But unfortunately I think she has just become a bad fish in a sea where many of the fish are toxic and therefore a bad catch. I just don’t know how I can try to move things forward with her and that’s what truly breaks my heart.
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Hate to hear that Strip. The only positive thing I can think of is at least you found out what kind of girl she was early on as this will likely save you a lot of heartache in the future. IMO, the best thing you can do right now is to not allow yourself to be at her beckon call as this will make her think that she can treat you any kind of way and you will continue to be there when it is convenient for her. I honestly believe that there is a girl out there, you have just not found her yet. Keep your head up and don't let her get you down
Big Schwanz Acht
@Big Schwanz Acht
Once you make ANY girl your sole focus you're doomed. A woman, by nature, wants a man that is his own person and someone she can fully respect. If you're pining for her like a puppy (not to mention stalking her), you don't have a chance...ever...with any woman. Once you've chartered your course for YOU, then you will attract all the women you could ever want, but the primary focus MUST be on you and your world, not some girl (idea) you have dreamed-up
She knew something was up and we talked about it the next day, she said it wasn’t true and said she was up video calling friends back at uni! I’ve seen a phone log type thing with times etc and it does appear to be above board. However she has been a little more distant than, well last year, but I still assume she wants to talk. I’m going to try n take on board this advice as it is very important!!! If I let her push me around I’ll get nowhere with her or any girl in fact. I need to handle this in the right way or it will come back at bite me somewhere in the future I’m certain
Big Schwanz Acht
@Big Schwanz Acht
I hate to say this, but she has already won (not that this is a game or anything). Do yourself a big favor and make yourself too busy to talk/think/obsess about this girl...she knows you're a puppy and will follow her every command
Stripeee;749133 said:
Good advice from BSA Strip. You don't have to ignore them, you can speak to them in passing. Women have a built in computer that constantly runs data on which men they lead around with a leash and which ones will not allow it. The ones that don't allow it are probably the ones that use them for a booty call, lol. We don't want to beat you down but the truth of the matter is, this girl will never treat you any different than she does now if you don't show her that you don't need her. I have known a few like this and once you turn the table on them, you usually end up having your cake and eating it too
She’s actually admitted that she’s gone for guys who don’t show much interest in her and that’s why she’s slept with a lot more people than I had assumsed (and would’ve liked). How do I interact with her in such a way tho? Coz atm she’s been doing an essay for uni but she is still online etc coz I can see multiple times she’s been online ‘x’ minutes ago? Even tho I messaged over an hour ago. This is what I struggle with and probably always will unfortunalty, it’s who I am, it’s like in another thread I made titled “I’m a loser” I’m just that guy.
Big Schwanz Acht
@Big Schwanz Acht
Stripeee;749296 said:
since you recognize your 'weakness', you don't have to be 'that guy'...it's your choice and 'getting the girl' or not won't change anything
Big Schwanz Acht
@Big Schwanz Acht
Stripeee;749309 said:
make your focus YOU, not her (or any other girl). If you have any interaction with her, make sure you're controlling the conversation and make sure you're the one to 'end-it', (just say, 'hey, it's been great catching-up (or whatever), but I've got to go'...it doesn't matter if you are busy or not, just be in charge of the exchange)
Big Schwanz Acht
@Big Schwanz Acht
It comes down to self control and self discipline. As BSA stated, you have to control the conversation and make sure that she knows you are doing her a favor by letting her take up your time to talk with her. Don't get me wrong, this skill takes practice but once you have mastered it, you will be surprised how women will go out of there way to spend time with you
Big Schwanz Acht
@Big Schwanz Acht
...yep, it becomes a part of your everyday behavior. practice on girls you have zero feeling for and see for yourself
Once you try it and see the results, it will change your outlook
I’d like to see this girl one more time before she goes back to uni Ngl,but she said she doesn’t want either of us to get attached so i guess that’s why she messages like once a day when she feels like it. I’m chatting to some other girls and I’m trying the whole response game and it seems to be working coz they seem really keen to meet!
Stripeee;749430 said:
Try this Strip if you are not already doing it. If she is messaging you once a day, don't be quick to respond. Take several hours or even wait until the next day to respond to her message. If she asks what took you so long to respond, tell her you were deep in something that you did not want to get out of, lol. One suggestion i could make is to not see her before she leaves. You already know the connection is not going to happen so just go ahead and make that break. Once she realizes that you are not her door mat anymore, you may notice a change in her
Big Schwanz Acht
@Big Schwanz Acht
daily text messages from women = a leash
she just wants to be sure you will always be at her beck-and-call...DO NOT RESPOND immediately no matter how tough
she just wants to be sure you will always be at her beck-and-call...DO NOT RESPOND immediately no matter how tough
Big Schwanz Acht
@Big Schwanz Acht
doublelongdaddy;749452 said:
Abstinence makes the dick grow harder
Big Schwanz Acht
@Big Schwanz Acht
doublelongdaddy;749578 said:I can attest to this!
we gotta get you laid, lol
My dick is getting harder atm Ngl! Hahaha, yeah if she messages later I will try leaving it around 24 hours then reply. I am tempted to just open the message then not respond for a while I.e a few weeks. I know I’ll get abuse but I was gonna message her before she leaves n just say like “all the best at uni, would be great to see you again in the near future”
Please don’t crucify me!!!!
Please don’t crucify me!!!!
Stripeee;749604 said:
Don't do it
Stripeee;749626 said:
I would not do that if I were you. I would simply tell her good luck in her future endeavors and see what kind of response you get
Big Schwanz Acht
@Big Schwanz Acht
'for closure'?? Are we on 'Oprah'??!! fuck closure, that's just fem-speak and it makes you look like an absolute eunuch (look it up). If you were a girl, would you want to spend any time with someone looking for 'closure'?
Big Schwanz Acht
@Big Schwanz Acht
Stripeee;749765 said:
You have feelings for the 'idea' of her, not the 'actual' her. I'll quote a bit of Red Pill Logic that made sense to me when I read it a few years ago:
Men love idealistically, meaning that we believe a woman truly loves us for who we are and not what we are (read that so it sinks in)
Women love opportunistically, meaning that they love what we are and not who we are. It's in their 'firmware' due to needing men for protection and provisions.
If you're having a conversation with a friend about a new girl you're seeing, does your friend ever ask 'what does she do?' Two women talking about a new guy, within the 1st 30 seconds they'l inquire, 'what does he do?'.
Once you begin to understand that women and men come-at love from two completely different spaces, you can then have a fighting chance...right now you may be a 'cute puppy', but eventually you'll end-up in the pound
Stripeee;749765 said:
Take a minute and read your post and tell us what you did wrong in that exchange. Not coming down on you but in order to learn you must first be able to recognize your mistakes and then correct them