Do you consider yourself an attractive person?

[penguinsfan]

Do you consider yourself an attractive person? What good qualities do you feel you bring to the table? What do you feel are your weaknesses. I'm very curious to hear everyone's answers and opinions of themselves.

 

[Gardenier90]

I don't consider myself attractive.

 

[penguinsfan]

Originally posted by Gardenier90
I don't consider myself attractive.

Interesting. What do you consider to be your best assets in attracting a desired female?

 

[penguinsfan]

As for myself, I think I bring a lot of honesty and an easygoing personality that many would find conducive to a solid relationship. I've got a decent head on my shoulders and I think I've got a good perspective on things, with my priorities being in order.

That being said, I feel my appearance is a significant handicap. For starters, it's been a bitch of a struggle to lose the weight I've lost and I'm just getting started, in terms of what I need to lose.
At one point, I had ballooned up to 252 lbs. and I'm now down to 218 lbs., but 145-160 lbs. is my desired end range. There is much work to be done. Some of you have read about my frustrations with weight loss, or rather a lack of, in other posts. I am trying to stay positive, but it's hard as hell.

Without a doubt, the greatest handicap is my hair/complexion. While I'm not ashamed of my Irish ancestry, I could have easily done without the red hair, freckles, and pale skin. Unfortunately, there is damn near nothing I can do to change this. The hair color I'm absolutely stuck with, barring a technological advancement in the coming years. While men may often be attracted to women with red hair, this is a one-way street. Anytime a woman compliments me on my hair, it's always a "I'd kill for that hair" type of comment, never a "I love that color on a man" comment. They seemingly want the hair for themselves and nothing to do with the rest of me. I have never, in my entire life, of a woman that was attracted to redheads. I believe I read one time that only 5% of women find red hair to be as attractive as any other color, while nearly 80% say they cannot picture themselves dating a redhead. Pretty grim.

While it would take a great deal of effort, I can tan and darken my complexion to some degree, but not without accenting my freckles, which I hate. Today, they do have the technology to remove freckles by way of laser, but I assume that, in addition to the expense of the procedure, there would be the problem of more freckles appearing when exposed to future sunlight. They're particularly bad around the shoulders and arms. The tattoo parlor would be the cheapest cover-up solution, but it would take a lot of work, to the point where many women would find such an excessive amount to be a turn-off.

The point I'm ultimately getting at is that "seduction" as we talk about it on this forum is frustrating to me. One has to portray confidence and keep his head high, not letting rejections sway him from his objectives. However, to me it seems to be such a facade, requiring some real aciting. It's like, why the hell can't I just admit that I'm not real confident, that I don't have a positive self-image, but that I do feel I've got good qualities?

Does anybody else feel this frustration? Is there someone out there that just wishes you could actually be you and not put on some show to strike up a nice conversation? Maybe this is why I've tried to turn friends into something more and complicated things, at times.

 

[MightyBigWeiner]

i really don't consider myself to be an attractive person, but heard about enough girls liking me. that was in the past anyway. but im guessing girls just say shit like "oh you're hot" and "damn you were my one big crush" to make us guys feel good... lol

Good qualities? I dunno, im cynical as hell (just read my site suckmystifter.com). Either way, I'm kinda working myself up to asking out girls and flirting and stuff. It seems to be working somewhat, so its all good well hopefully

 

[fallen_one23]

I'm decent in the looks compartment, I've had a of of girls say that I'm hot, or they say their friend said it or something. I have a good personality, get dates and a lot of friends, so I'm attractive.

 

[bigbutnottoo]

I guess this isn't really something to complain about, but it has always baffled me.

Usually really attractive females find me really attractive but no one else does. As if my looks are some esoteric taste or something.

 

[Spektrum]

My self esteem isn't the greatest, but I find myself fairly attractive. I'm bi too, so I guess I can really get a better idea of if I'm hot or not.

Been called 'hot' many times by many different girls. Also had a 9.something rating on hotornot.com

Most ackward time someone said I was attractvie was at my mom's work. One of the workers said, 'wow! he's hot!' I turned the color of cheeky cherry's website, lol.

 

[penguinsfan]

I don't consider myself to be the ugliest guy on the block. I think the red hair is my greatest obstacle, besides my bodyfat percentage, though I've made stides and will continue to do so.

I just wish, in terms of trying to find anything meaningful, that I could be myself. I have problems. I don't have a great self-image and I'm not confident. Why the hell can't I just be myself and have women recognize me for my other qualities?

 

[PaloMalo]

Penguin.....I'm glad you posted this because now I can give you a little butt kickin' ---- Out of Love of course

Shit man--do you really think that hair color is gonna be the KEY factor in preventing you from meeting women...honest answer...its your shitty attitude....you are not thinking clearly...thats all but I know what you are saying man because society programs us to look at things the way you are doing it and I've been there myself....its really lame and worst of all boring....think about it....you wrote about this on the fucking internet....and I am answering because everyone has some issue they think is make or break so I can feel you....

Right now you are AFRAID....thats right you are scared to go out and meet women....and because of this fear you are making excuses to justify you staying out of the game....YOU ARE NOT GOING TO GET ANYWHERE BY MAKING EXCUSES!!!!!!!!

So if you don't like red hair dye it jet black...No more fucking hair color excuse....but I'd bet you you are not gonna do it....I'm more of the opinion that getting a kick ass haircut is in order....the color don't really matter....and as far as weight loss....just focus on it one day at a time....and pay for a personal trainer or ask a friend for help....shit don't be afraid to ask for help from real people in your life.....

But Until you start playing the Game and get out there and interact with women which can be scary at first but eventually becomes exciting and fun as hell you will be in the wrong category: the loser category....

And cut that be myself bullshit thought.....what you are saying is you wish you didn't have to confront your fears and get out of your comfort zone in order to get to where you want to be....it takes work and time to learn any skill and picking up women is a skill that most men do not have....most just get lucky....so focus on it....you sound like you really need the bootcamp at www.fastseduction.com

Good Luck....2004 is YOUR YEAR....I can feel it




:rocker: :rocker: :rocker: :rocker:

 

[penguinsfan]

Originally posted by PaloMalo
Penguin.....I'm glad you posted this because now I can give you a little butt kickin' ---- Out of Love of course

I figured I might get a butt kickin' from you.

Shit man--do you really think that hair color is gonna be the KEY factor in preventing you from meeting women...honest answer...its your shitty attitude....you are not thinking clearly...

I am convinced that the hair color is a colossal obstacle to overcome. Women simply do not like it. This is pretty well established from surveys and shit. Again, it seems to bring women attention, but it is a one-way street.

I realize that there is an issue with me stepping out of the comfort zone. I would like for women to recognize the good qualities I have. This might work in s situation where friends turn into more than friends, but such a situation is damn near mythical. The only thing that ever happens is a friendship ruined.

I don't want to present a picture of me that is not me, but I realize that one has to, perhaps, overemphasize his value, much as a saleman will do to make a sale. It does not necessarily me I lose integrity in the process, but it is possible.

Right now you are AFRAID....

There is certainly some truth to that.

So if you don't like red hair dye it jet black...No more fucking hair color excuse....but I'd bet you you are not gonna do it....

With my freckles and ghost-white complexion? Come on, that is not a serious option. Best case scenario, I could possibly lighten it to look more blonde.

And cut that be myself bullshit thought.....what you are saying is you wish you didn't have to confront your fears and get out of your comfort zone in order to get to where you want to be....it takes work and time to learn any skill and picking up women is a skill that most men do not have....most just get lucky....so focus on it....you sound like you really need the bootcamp at www.fastseduction.com

I checked the site out before and it seemed to overwhelm me with information. There is obviously a lot of good material on the site. If you could possibly give me some direct links to some of the best stuff there, I would appreciate it.

2004 is YOUR YEAR....I can feel it

I hope you're right about that.

 

[PaloMalo]

K....here is a link to a page with an archive of posts from some of the more interesting people on ASF...which is the fastseduction message board. I'd recommend you get on it....instructions are on the website....

http://www.fastseduction.com/archives/

Now I'd download the archives of Mystery and Tyler Durden and read through them....Mystery is like one of the grand champs at meeting women and really getting them attracted quickly....it is long but read it in chunks and try to adopt his mindset...because that is really where its at....TD has some great stuff too so check it out....But remember don't be one of these fastseduction jack-ass armchair seducers that just read and read and don't go out and apply the ideas that they learn...GO OUT AND TALK TO Penis EnlargementOPLE....women, men, old ladies, little kids....

As far as your haircolor goes....look I said jet black but do what you want....get a great haircut fuck it go to a trendy hair place and pay $30 or $50 or whatever....trust me its worth it....consider it a fucking investment in yourself....and talk to a stylist there about your hair....honestly they will lead you in the right direction....find a stylist you like and just go to him or her for your haircuts from now on.....

Get a tan....nothing extreme like George Hamilton but a tan is healthy and tells girls that you are outdoorsy not some guy locked up all day in front of a computer....you can even try those tanning creams...I have no experience with them but they should work well....

I have dark hair but I've gotta tell you if I had a fucking bald head (nothing against bald people just an example) or an insane fucking green haircolor by some freak genetic accident I would not let that stop me from getting out and going after what I want. I mean shit there are albino people out there with white hair who I'm sure are doing fine with the ladies...

Girls are not as into looks as guys. Sure when they see Brad Pitt they get excited but the personality is far more important. Looks might make it easier to get her attention but once you've got it its time to play the game right.

As far as your good qualities BS...listen man, everyone has some good qualities. A fucking low-life on death row still has some positive qualities but the truth is girls want to discover the good qualities within the men they are ATTRACTED TO....so they key is to attract them first....don't think of some friend's first BS either thats the way women think....from now on YOU ARE A MAN...that means you know what you want and go after it directly....none of this fucking nice guy puppy dogs and ice cream shit...that doesn't mean you have to become some rude classless jerk but it does mean that you don't hide or stomp out your sexual side....just treat all people the same and make quick decisions about women...if you want her game her from the first second you see her....playing the game is something you must start doing all the time.....trust me dive into it and go for it...you only live once....you won't regret it for one second.....


quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
2004 is YOUR YEAR....I can feel it
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------



I hope you're right about that.

Its up to YOU to make it your year.....good luck



:rocker: :rocker: :rocker: :rocker:

 

[stillwantmore]

I think I'm attractive too. In fact, I KNOW I am. For example, I had to run my mom something up to her work last week. While I was there, she took me around on a short "tour" introducing me to everyone. I mean EVERYONE! LOL. Anyway, I found out later that night from her that two attractive women who work there with her (my age group) confided in her after I had left that I was "a hottie". I usually get at least a few smiles and or looks from women whenever I'm out doing things.

What do I bring to the "table"? Well, not much monetarily or materially speaking right now. Working on that. As far as me though, I think I have a good personallity, I like to make people laugh when I can. I'm pretty outgoing but, not the center of attention usually. I love children, so I'd make someone a good father some day. I'm a decent cook. I'm pretty confident. I'm good putting things together/fixing things. I've been told I'm very polite most of the time....also I'm one of those guys who usually opens the door for a woman. Just some examples.

 

[Stoffel17]

I look at myself in the mirror and think, "Shit, who's that sexy beast in the mirror?" Then I realize its me. I see women making eye contact, pretending not to look, and then giving a little smile all the time. God damn I'm fine! I'm also cool as all shit. Shit, I could be up at 3 am in my boxers, in the kitchen, with peanut butter all over my face and milk dribbling down my chin and I'd still be the hottest piece of meat on the block.

I rule.

 

[penguinsfan]

Originally posted by PaloMalo
As far as your haircolor goes....look I said jet black but do what you want....get a great haircut fuck it go to a trendy hair place and pay $30 or $50 or whatever....trust me its worth it....consider it a fucking investment in yourself....and talk to a stylist there about your hair....honestly they will lead you in the right direction....find a stylist you like and just go to him or her for your haircuts from now on.....

Any suggestions on how I find a place that can offer some good advice? I've always gone cheap on my haircuts ($10-$15). I work with a woman that is trying to get a singing career established and she uses the services on an image consultant. The funny thing is I saw pictures of her when she was in her late teens and competing in beauty pagents. She wasn't bad looking, but she has let herself go and she freely admits it. She eats like an absolute horse and sits on her ass. She says she thinks she actually has good metabolism, given her food intake and activity level and I believe her. It makes me sick to see someone like her wasting her life away like that, when I have to slave myself to lose even a pound. Anyway, the point I was getting at was I asked her hohw much an image consultant would charge to sit and talk with me about things I could do to my appearance. She told me for a simple consultation, I'd be looking at $500-$1,000. To actually reccommend really specific changes, like going shopping for new clothes, getting the new hair style, etc., the fees would total anywhere between $5,000-$10,000 for a day or two. Needless to say, I about fell over. So, I would be open to what a $40 stylist had to offer, in terms of advice.

Get a tan....nothing extreme like George Hamilton but a tan is healthy and tells girls that you are outdoorsy not some guy locked up all day in front of a computer....you can even try those tanning creams...I have no experience with them but they should work well....

The creams aren't too bad in terms of results. But they can be a little expensive for regular use for someone like myself that does not have a lot of money to spare. In addition, one has to apply them and then let them dry completely for about two hours. If a person uses them twice a week then that's about six hours out of his week, given application time and the time that you spend walking around naked, but not being able to touch or do anything. I'm not making any excuses, but just discussing my experiences.

As for a real tan, I'd love to do that, except for one thing. Certain parts of my skin really freckle heavily. Thank goodness my face is not too bad. I could get some sun and my face would look relatively uniform in color, but my forearms, shoulders, and most of my body would get dense with freckles. I know these days freckles can be treated with lasers, but I assume the process is cost prohibitive for the average person. Another thing to consider is that they might just come back in other spots on the body, or even return on the same places, with additional exposure to the sun. I have thought about taking the worst areas of my freckles and just tattooing the freckles into oblivion. Naturally, some women would find that appealling and many would not. One of the greatest benefits to natural tanning is that I could actually build-up enough tolerance to sunlight that I may be able to go out into the sun and not burn like a lobster within 15 minutes. I know most of you don't know quite what it's like to have that kind of complexion, but let's just say it sucks major ass.

Girls are not as into looks as guys. Sure when they see Brad Pitt they get excited but the personality is far more important. Looks might make it easier to get her attention but once you've got it its time to play the game right.

You really think so? Huh. I always had them pegged as hypocrites on this issue. I've heard women say that looks are not that important and I've heard men like yourself say that is what they think. But it seems in practice they're as bad or worse. I have seen countless good girls that exude all the right qualities and seem to have the mature outlook on the important qualities talk about how they just want an honest, caring, sensitive, blah-blah guy and two weeks later you learn they're dating the biggest asshole stereotypical jock on campus.

A fucking low-life on death row still has some positive qualities but the truth is girls want to discover the good qualities within the men they are ATTRACTED TO....so they key is to attract them first....don't think of some friend's first BS either thats the way women think....from now on YOU ARE A MAN...that means you know what you want and go after it directly....none of this fucking nice guy puppy dogs and ice cream shit...that doesn't mean you have to become some rude classless jerk but it does mean that you don't hide or stomp out your sexual side....

I think that is some pretty good advice and I'll have to start implementing that into my life.

 

[penguinsfan]

Originally posted by stillwantmore
What do I bring to the "table"? Well, not much monetarily or materially speaking right now. Working on that. As far as me though, I think I have a good personallity, I like to make people laugh when I can. I'm pretty outgoing but, not the center of attention usually. I love children, so I'd make someone a good father some day. I'm a decent cook. I'm pretty confident. I'm good putting things together/fixing things. I've been told I'm very polite most of the time....also I'm one of those guys who usually opens the door for a woman. Just some examples.

I think I would describe my good qualities in much the same way. Or course, the problem is these are qualities that you don't necessarily recognize from across the room, looking at a stranger. Like PaloMalo said, you've got to attract them first.

 

[ItsElectric]

Honestly, I think I look good, and my dick is getting bigger. I'm not a retard and I know some seduction. I'm set for a little while.

-ItsElectric

 

[PaloMalo]

Penguin,

Shit I used to joke around with my friends and folks that I would like to get paid to take guys out shopping for clothes and teach them how to comport themselves in different social situations and then charge them a few thousand bucks for my help but I always thought it was just a dream until now....I want to be an image consultant...hahaha

As far as hair place....I'm not sure what part of the U.S. you are in but most major cities will have plenty of nice upper end places to get your haircut...ask around especially the stylish girls because I guarantee that the stylish girls are not getting their hair cut at supercuts...and once you go to the place try out a few different stylists until you find one you like....it tooks me a few haircuts to land on the stylist that I like but now I always go back to the same person and I'm happy with my haircut...

Try out tanning when you get a chance to....but for now focus on your haircut and getting to the gym.....

And Check your PM....

 

[bigbutnottoo]

What is this? "Straight Guy for the Queer Eye"?

 

[penguinsfan]

Originally posted by bigbutnottoo
What is this? "Straight Guy for the Queer Eye"?

Hey, whatever works.

 

[PaloMalo]

Originally posted by bigbutnottoo
What is this? "Straight Guy for the Queer Eye"?

Nah.....this is "Deal With Your Issues so that you can go out and get pussy 101"




:rocker: :rocker: :rocker: :rocker:

 

[bigbutnottoo]

my fault. Its"metrosexual" not queer.

 

[penguinsfan]

PaloMalo, thanks for the gifts via e-mail.

 

[penguinsfan]

Hey, we were talking about tanning and shit. Now perhaps this deserves and entirely separate thread to give it the attention it deserves, as it might get lost in here. I work with a guy that used to be an exotic dancer on the weekends. Now, he manages a business of exotic dancers where he books male revues at bars in the area. Still he likes to keep in great physical condition and he appeared in Playgirl several months ago. The point is he makes fairly regular visits to the tanning bed. The other day, in a casual conversation, he suggested I tan. My immediate response was that I would freckle bad enough that they would standout and ruin my complexion. He said that might not be the case. He told me that he had freckles on a couple parts of his body (his hair is blond) but that the tanning bed really does not seem to accent his freckles. What do you guys think?

 

[bigbutnottoo]

Go for it. I am considering the same. I will probably wait and buy one to put in my basement.

 

[penguinsfan]

Originally posted by bigbutnottoo
Go for it. I am considering the same. I will probably wait and buy one to put in my basement.

Do you freckle? If so, do you freckle heavily and do you consider it to take away from your appearance?

 

[dopefish]

Originally posted by Stoffel17
I look at myself in the mirror and think, "Shit, who's that sexy beast in the mirror?" Then I realize its me. I see women making eye contact, pretending not to look, and then giving a little smile all the time. God damn I'm fine! I'm also cool as all shit. Shit, I could be up at 3 am in my boxers, in the kitchen, with peanut butter all over my face and milk dribbling down my chin and I'd still be the hottest piece of meat on the block.

I rule.

LOL, a good read

dopefish

 

[Hobgoblin]

Two part answer to this one.

Part one: Yes, I consider myself physically very attractive. Luck of genetics mainly, half german and half italian, 6'1" with naturally strong musculature.

Part two (the bad news): Last couple of years my mind seems to have changed on me, and I've become increasingly anti-social and inwardly insecure. I come across as cold and aloof, and feel that I have nothing in common with the people I meet. Conversations are a strain. Picking up women in all kinds of places used to be the most natural thing in the world for me. Now, speaking to the person at the dry cleaners is an almost unbearable annoyance. Some of it is contempt, and I have a very difficult time with trust. Ok, so maybe I'm paranoid.

I'm monogamous for the first time in my life, and I flip back and forth between two perceptions. One day, its a great thing to find someone I can trust and that I share common ideas with. The next day, I'm with her only because I'm hiding from the rest of the world.

Shitty thing to say, but hey its true. And it isn't a reflection on her, she's a wonderful woman. But I know this isn't the real me.

I posted another thread basically on how to pick up girls by being yourself. Maybe I come across as a hypocrite now, sort of "do as I say, not as I do", but they are things that used to work for me, and I remember them vividly. I still have plenty of outside interests, I just dont want to share them with anyone.

I don't think it's social anxiety disorder, because there isn't any fear involved. Just cynicism. Nothing more fun than a few drinks and some self diagnosis, right?

So overall do I consider myself attractive? Only on the outside.

Anyway, Penguin the point is that charm is worth at least as much, if not more, than physical appearance. I know because I have plenty of one and none of the other.

Going to go mix my hemlock now. (just kidding) lol


Hobgoblin

 

[PaloMalo]

Hobgoblin:

It's hard to really explain how to deal with the personal issues because we've all been there at some point in time as far as like dealing with social issues and feeling totally at ease in social environments and working the room.....but I think that the first key is bringing yourself up to the point where you are not going to be overly self-conscious by taking care of things like health/fitness, grooming, dress, etc...and it sounds like you've said you feel fine on the outside....thats great because you are now more than half-way there....

Then once you have handled the external issues it really is just a matter of getting outside of your own head and interacting with people well keeping a few points about attraction in your head (or better yet internalizing them so that they come out naturally)

I think that in many ways the contempt feeling for others is just a defense mechanism you have so that you feel superior and above having to interact with people or actually pick-up that hot girl....actually as you have said you are not feeling on top of the world internally....so this is a sign of it...I've personally only overcome these feelings by going out and talking to people IN SPITE OF THEM....its usually just a little nervous energy I have when I go out and even if I get something similar to it now (and feel like I shouldn't have to go up to that girl or talk to those people because I am so cool--thats what the feeling is) I just truck through it and feel great even after a few blown sets or bad interactions....because eventually talking to people and interacting socially gives me the opportunity to prove without a doubt just how cool and fun and fearless and adventurous I really am....hahaha

:rocker: :rocker: :rocker: :rocker:


P.S. Stay away from the hemlock.....causes terrible hangover lol