i know oh too well why you do not want to go to a doctor
cap.
you're scared.
i know the words "go see a doctor" seem so easy and simple, but for someone in your shoes, it is the most scary and daunting thing in the entire world right now. you try to play it down by convincing yourself it's not cancer, and that you have read xxx number of articles on google about this and that, but at the end of the day, its still on your mind.
how do i know this? because i also went through it. around 3 years ago, i began to notice a small lump inside under my left testicle. i told myself ok don't panic, just go see your doctor and they will deal with it. but i was afriad. i put it off for a few days, a few days became a few weeks, and here i am 3 years later.
during the last 3 years i went through many phases. i went from being convinced i would lose my left testicle and actually began feeling like my left testicle felt different to my healthy right testicle, in effect preparing myself for the possibility of one day losign it. and indeed i did believe that i would lose it and began contemplating a life with just one testicle. the worst was towards the end of the 3 years, i actually prepared myself for the news of cancer (not knowing that if it was cancer, i would have already been dead).
its so stupid how we torture ourselves when we could just gather the courage and go to the doctor and end the not knowing.
anyway in the end, i said i fuck this. i am not going to live my life in fear. if i die from this then so be it but i want to fucking know what it is. so one day in the car i just told my parents (who are doctors), i said i wanna tell you guys something. around 3 years ago i noticed a lump in my nut. i havent told anyone about it until now.
they did there best to downplay it and not make it a big deal to calm me down. they cancelled all their appointments that day and we went on an adenvture of blood tests and ultra sounds and so on. results were aparent the same day...it was not cancer, obviously, because had it been cancer, and i had kept qiete for 3 years, it would have killed me. it was a epididymal cyst, or epididimitis or something, i forgot the correct name. the doctors said it is completely harmless, and there is not even any need to remove it.
since that day i have never thought about it again.
i hope you have gone to your doctor and are not going through what i went through.
good luck.
ps: i am peing like a rabbit on heat, so if you get the all clear, it's all engines go mate.
thanks for asking, it is just a cyst which I still have. It doesn't get in the way at all. There may be some that aren't that lucky though.