Im not into any specific religion, but i do believe in a creator... and since its Sunday, heres a prayer i saw somewhere..
Lord, I know that you wouldn’t create something unless it was beautiful,
And I know that you created me.
Therefore, I know that I am beautiful.
And because my penis is part of me,
No matter how ridiculously thick and meaty it is,
No matter how many sparrows could perch upon its endless shaft,
No matter how much it resembles a tube of raw cookie dough,
I know that yes-my penis is beautiful, too.
Its extraordinary size represents the extraordinary love in Your heart.
Its burdensome weight is a reminder of temptation’s ceaseless pull.
For even though You have given me the ability to fellate myself,
Oh, Father in Heaven,
Creator of the Universe,
Master of time and space,
Watch over my penis.
Guard it from scorn,
Shield it from shame,
And keep it from getting pinched under the toilet seat.
Oh Lord, grant me the serenity to accept the
thing between my legs,
The courage to wear shorts in public,
And the wisdom to shake copiously after urinating.
Amen.
Lord, I know that you wouldn’t create something unless it was beautiful,
And I know that you created me.
Therefore, I know that I am beautiful.
And because my penis is part of me,
No matter how ridiculously thick and meaty it is,
No matter how many sparrows could perch upon its endless shaft,
No matter how much it resembles a tube of raw cookie dough,
I know that yes-my penis is beautiful, too.
Its extraordinary size represents the extraordinary love in Your heart.
Its burdensome weight is a reminder of temptation’s ceaseless pull.
For even though You have given me the ability to fellate myself,
Oh, Father in Heaven,
Creator of the Universe,
Master of time and space,
Watch over my penis.
Guard it from scorn,
Shield it from shame,
And keep it from getting pinched under the toilet seat.
Oh Lord, grant me the serenity to accept the
thing between my legs,
The courage to wear shorts in public,
And the wisdom to shake copiously after urinating.
Amen.
