Time to put the ball in her court?

[BIGPimpin]

Been talking to a girl and tried setting up a date but things didnt work out. Well since then she has gone back to college and we have been talking. Just tonight i told her "that ill call her sometime or she can call me if she wants". Well i think im just gonna wait on that call from her to see if she is really interested and until then play the field. Sound like a good idea??

 

[penguinsfan]

Yeah dude, don't risk looking pathetic by continuing to chase her. I'm not saying you're there yet, as I don't know all the details, but you will be if you continue long enough. Totally move on to setting your sights on others, and see if the "woman want what they can't have" philosophy holds true.

 

[bIgjOe]

I don't know man, some girls are still brought up in the school of thought that it isn't appropriate for them to call the guy. Especially if you aren't already dating, so take that into consideration. Also if she is away she won't have you there to see and be thinking about as much, so you do run the risk of her thinking your not interested anymore and then quickly moving on. I'm not saying burn up the wire, by all means play it cool. Call like a week from now, and when you do listen very carefully to her tone of voice, and how quickly she has to get off the phone, also how believable the reason is. If it happens more than 2-3 times that she has to get off the phone shortly after answering, besides being in class, then I would give up. Also if you suspect she is avoiding your calls, she probably is, in which case you should also forget about her. You can always tell when a girl is genuinely happy to be talking to you by her tone of voice. Women characteristically wear their emotions on their sleeve. Why do you think you always hear about women getting annoyed when "he can't take the hint." Of course for a normal person those hints are nearly impossible to spot. Therefore I've found just going with your gut and not being totally blinded by emotion will keep you above water. Always wait at least a week between calls if you decide that it is worth continuing to call.

 

[ggogeta]

Been talking to a girl and tried setting up a date but things didnt work out. Well since then she has gone back to college and we have been talking. Just tonight i told her "that ill call her sometime or she can call me if she wants". Well i think im just gonna wait on that call from her to see if she is really interested and until then play the field. Sound like a good idea??

First of, you need to state the situation clear:

1) I'll call you sometimes(meaning, when I WANT)
1.5)If you never return my calls, too bad, you missed a great opportunity

2) Call me ( meaning you have enough self confidence to know she will call )
2.5) If she doesn't call, too bad she missed a great opportunity.

It's one or the other I guess since giving too many options actually translate into " I really want you to talk to me because I need you so bad" which is a pretty negative thing regarding first dates.

Sounds counter intuitive I know...

 

[iwant8inches]

First of, you need to state the situation clear:

1) I'll call you sometimes(meaning, when I WANT)
1.5)If you never return my calls, too bad, you missed a great opportunity

2) Call me ( meaning you have enough self confidence to know she will call )
2.5) If she doesn't call, too bad she missed a great opportunity.

It's one or the other I guess since giving too many options actually translate into " I really want you to talk to me because I need you so bad" which is a pretty negative thing regarding first dates.

Sounds counter intuitive I know...

Perfecto! You don't need her, but you are interested. That's all she should know at that point.

 

[Girthius]

Once you start chasing them, then they have won the game, and loose interest!You need to turn the tables on her!Once she starts coming after you, you need to keep her off balance(does she have you or not??)This will keep her interested.I would explain more, but I'm pushed for time right now.

 

[Pandora]

What brand of hanger do you use to hang for such periods of time and how do you break them up? If you don't mind me asking.

 

[Pandora]

hone:

 

[ggogeta]

Once you start chasing them, then they have won the game, and loose interest!You need to turn the tables on her!Once she starts coming after you, you need to keep her off balance(does she have you or not??)This will keep her interested.I would explain more, but I'm pushed for time right now.

that is true. But it should be always fun. always.

 

[sikdogg]

Been talking to a girl and tried setting up a date but things didnt work out. Well since then she has gone back to college and we have been talking. Just tonight i told her "that ill call her sometime or she can call me if she wants". Well i think im just gonna wait on that call from her to see if she is really interested and until then play the field. Sound like a good idea??

Bad move to tell her "that ill call her sometime or she can call me if she wants"... shows no balls on your part. Assume that she won't call and move on...

Generally, after meeting someone i would give them 2 chances to go out with me. If something comes up both times to prevent us from going out, then it's time to move on. If i leave her voicemail the first time i call her and she doesn't return my call within a day or two, time to move on. Don't even waste time trying to call again.

If she does call back several days later and wants to go out, you tell her that you made plans when she didn't call back but you'd be willing to give her one more try and that you'll call at a certain day and time (be specific). This is a test, if she's interested she'll be available to answer your call. If you get her voicemail when you call, move on and don't make anymore plans with her even if she calls again (because now she turning the tables on you and testing you).

NEVER EVER appear needy or desperate for her... make sure she knows that you have other options. If she calls back on a Friday or Saturday after 3PM, let your machine get it. Never let her know that you had nothing better to do than wait for her call (even if it's true). If she calls before 3PM, tell her you already have plans but you'll call her back another time (again be specific).

Bro, if you don't take ownership of your balls... she'll step on them.

 

[REDZULU2003]

Exactly right about the balls part sikdogg.

Woman will love to crush them, dont let them. Take control. If this woman doesnt get back to you after a few tries than 'fuck it' .. move on.

I have recently failed with a woman at work I wanted. Turned out she was never into me ... yet SHE SENT ME SIGNALS that she was. I have now wiped the slate clean with her, so we can still work well together ... but I wont be getting closer to her or moveing in on her anymore ... her chance has gone, fuck it...I'll move on.

 

[ggogeta]

Anyways, it's never the "time to put the ball into her court"

You're the man, and you're leading. Even though don't start to be violent or some shit :s