Kicking my Addiction

[FlashGordon]

My wife and I have been trying to get pregnant which has meant lots of sex. However, over the last month I've noticed I can barely get hard and it's starting to a take toll on us. After reading some articles and other people's posts I think I'm addicted to adult entertainment and masturbating. I've been doing it almost everyday and it's really taking its toll. I saw the 100 day challenge one user is going through and it inspired me to start my own path for recovery. I'm just starting buy know I'm going to struggle. Does anyone that's kicked their addiction have any advice? I notice I do it a lot when I'm bored and home alone. Any advice on what to do when I feel the urge?

 

[Big Schwanz Acht]

exercise? walk the dog?

 

[DreadMan]

A few years ago i stopped watching adult entertainment . I was 25 and had a crazy hard time getting it up . I joined a no fap challenge on R3dd1t. Alot of the guys there pair up and have a buddy who you will stay in contact with. My bud whom i still keep in connect with texted every day just to keep each other accountable. I used a no adult entertainment filter on google chrome and a day counter widget on my phone screen so i could always see how far along i was. When ever i got the urge i would do push ups. After the 1st week or 2 it was easy.

just like anything in life you have to make the choice that your ready to quit once you make that choice and you really want to quit you will handle it no issue

 

[quazimodo_007]

My wife and I have been trying to get pregnant which has meant lots of sex. However, over the last month I've noticed I can barely get hard and it's starting to a take toll on us. After reading some articles and other people's posts I think I'm addicted to adult entertainment and masturbating. I've been doing it almost everyday and it's really taking its toll. I saw the 100 day challenge one user is going through and it inspired me to start my own path for recovery. I'm just starting buy know I'm going to struggle. Does anyone that's kicked their addiction have any advice? I notice I do it a lot when I'm bored and home alone. Any advice on what to do when I feel the urge?

How are things with your wife, how does she treat you and is she good looking or in shape?

 

[DLD]

Watching adult entertainment is the enemies way of entering your relationship, like a parasite, and distorting love and sex in such a way that is causes us to lose interest in normal sex as the adult entertainment is extreme. adult entertainment and masturbation both will destroy a marriage. You will not be perfect and I have found that counting days makes it harder to abstain. Make a choice today to eliminate it from your life and replace it with your wife and your eq and libido will become healthy once again. I have written heavily on this in my ministries and also here in the Brotherhood. If you desire and can post my latest study, it is very helpful and based in Christianity. I have also written heavily on this outside the realm of Christianity. I suggest looking through it all. Here is a very good thing to realize in taking on this challenge...Do not make rules! Rules do one thing for us, we break them. Instead of making a rule or law, make it a loving gesture towards you wife. Instead of living under a law, live under grace. Self imposed laws only cause failure. Live in the moment and feel accomplished that today you gave not looked at adult entertainment or masturbated, feel good for the day as that may be all you have. Sorry if I sound like I am being hard on you, I simply want you to rid yourself of a habit that in everyday steals from your wife you. I love my Brothers and I have done this for 16 years, I give warnings based on very heavy researched and experienced knowledge.

 

[FlashGordon]

Thanks for the info! I really appreciate it. I like the push ups/exercise when the urge creeps up so I think I'm going to try that at first.

 

[FlashGordon]

How are things with your wife, how does she treat you and is she good looking or in shape?

Things with her are great, she treats me well, and is in decent shape. She's a little overweight but nothing unattractive. She gets upset when I struggle to get hard but other than that everything is great.

 

[FlashGordon]

How are things with your wife, how does she treat you and is she good looking or in shape?

Thanks for the response! I will definitely look at things as loving gestures instead of rules, it definitely sounds like that'll help. I can't begin to say how appreciative I am of the support and this forum!

 

[quazimodo_007]

Things with her are great, she treats me well, and is in decent shape. She's a little overweight but nothing unattractive. She gets upset when I struggle to get hard but other than that everything is great.

I would watch adult entertainment instead of fuck my ex because she wasnt that hot, but i coyld still get it up if i wanted too you on any meds?

 

[DLD]

Messed up last night, 2 times in one month Been going through a lot of stress and depression lately, this makes me a prime target for the enemy. Pray for me Brothers!

 

[quazimodo_007]

Messed up last night, 2 times in one month Been going through a lot of stress and depression lately, this makes me a prime target for the enemy. Pray for me Brothers!

Me too a few days ago but PE especially girth exercises are easier with adult entertainment, but my trick was to get pics of cute local girls or instgram chicks that are real that turn me on and use those instead of adult entertainment and use https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_abYFeilfzM like those videos for aural arousal. I don't have a woman at the minute so i need to improvise getting a woman can stopping the adult entertainment habbit. and ask god for forgiveness and help and move on

 

[DLD]

Me too a few days ago but PE especially girth exercises are easier with adult entertainment, but my trick was to get pics of cute local girls or instgram chicks that are real that turn me on and use those instead of adult entertainment and use https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_abYFeilfzM like those videos for aural arousal. I don't have a woman at the minute so i need to improvise getting a woman can stopping the adult entertainment habbit. and ask god for forgiveness and help and move on

Again last night, I think!

Let me explain. Obviously I am a Christ follower with great love for Jesus. I say "I think" because I never truly know without investigating. The enemy will attack me when I am completely delirious and without my functions. This happens when I stay up too late and am on sleeping medication. This is when I am weak and it becomes hard to stop. The enemy is pussy and a coward and will only attack me when I am without my faculties, never when I am awake. Last night I was not sure if I messed up or not. When I woke up I did not remember either. It was not until I checked my history that I found out. This is where I find a great deal of joy as I can honestly say it was not me, it was the sin that still in me. This is in no way an excuse, I can be more disciplined with myself and take my medication and go to sleep according to the schedule and I will not fall into the enemies trap. I will waste not a moment in guilt on something I have no recollection of. And when I did see the history files I gave no credit to the enemy, I said "Fuck off bitch! I did this, not you!, be gone coward!" when we take the power from the enemy in this way there is no satisfaction on his part.

I have been going through the most trying time in my life right now so I am seeing myself do things I truly do not want to do. In times of stress, anxiety, depression, etc. I am never hard on myself for a wrong I may have committed against myself. I know that I am human and I will sometimes reach for the old ways of dealing with things. What matters most to me is the fact Jesus forgave me of all of my sins, past, present and future leaving no satisfaction for the cowardly pussy enemy!

 

[Big Schwanz Acht]

You have the entire strength of each and every brother here whenever and however you need...know this in your heart. You're never alone and will always have the love and support from us (and I am definitely speaking for each member here!)

 

[Lookn4girth]

Take it one day at a time FG and keep posting here so that all of the brothers here can help you ride your way through this. Tell yourself that you can beat it and will not let it control you or your life.

- - - Updated - - -

You have the entire strength of each and every brother here whenever and however you need...know this in your heart. You're never alone and will always have the love and support from us (and I am definitely speaking for each member here!)

Amen brother BSA

 

[FlashGordon]

I would watch adult entertainment instead of fuck my ex because she wasnt that hot, but i coyld still get it up if i wanted too you on any meds?

I'm not on any meds. I was taking a testosterone booster from Alpha Prime and protein powder to help with my gym workouts. I don't take those anymore though because I thought they were part of the problem too.

 

[FlashGordon]

Thanks for all the posts brothers, I appreciate hearing encouraging words and about your struggles as well. It's been a little over a week but I did masturbate once. It wasn't with any adult entertainment, though. Despite that one set back I'm not beating myself up about it since it was just once. Before I started this I would do it 2-3 times a day so one time in a week is definitely an improvement.
I'm also trying to improve other areas of myself and life to make everything better so I don't fall down that hole again.

 

[DLD]

You have the entire strength of each and every brother here whenever and however you need...know this in your heart. You're never alone and will always have the love and support from us (and I am definitely speaking for each member here!)

Thank you my Brother and I do feel the love. My heart is breaking over my Son and His wife! My Son is making a very bad choice and I can do nothing to stop it. I know more about relationships, sex and break ups than anything else, I have done this for years. Knowing my Son is making a terrible choice, based on my experiences, is destroying me! He has two beautiful children and a great wife but has found something on the side that is brushing His ego and destroying the family. She is a slut, my Son met her because she sent naked pictures to 3 guys with her phone number and the first to call got with her, that was my Son. I tried to explain that a girl who does that will do it again, but He thinks she won't because she loves Him. I told Him everything I would tell to a Brother here. Sometimes my Brothers listen and ave themselves from a world of hurt. My Son will not listen to me. He is heading into the worst place a family man can go and it is all for the pussy! I am crushed, I am sad, I feel completely lost and out of touch. I love my Son with all my heart but I hate what He is doing. He is getting drunk, being irresponsible with the children when He gets them, He is simply in a very bad place and as a Daddy I am lost to what to do. So I ask you all to pray for me, my Son and my Family. Family means everything to me, this is why the Brotherhood is set up like a family. I know Jesus is in my Son and I know that He will not leave Him, I just hope my Son sees this before He wrecks what is left to the relationship.

 

[FlashGordon]

Thank you my Brother and I do feel the love. My heart is breaking over my Son and His wife! My Son is making a very bad choice and I can do nothing to stop it. I know more about relationships, sex and break ups than anything else, I have done this for years. Knowing my Son is making a terrible choice, based on my experiences, is destroying me! He has two beautiful children and a great wife but has found something on the side that is brushing His ego and destroying the family. She is a slut, my Son met her because she sent naked pictures to 3 guys with her phone number and the first to call got with her, that was my Son. I tried to explain that a girl who does that will do it again, but He thinks she won't because she loves Him. I told Him everything I would tell to a Brother here. Sometimes my Brothers listen and ave themselves from a world of hurt. My Son will not listen to me. He is heading into the worst place a family man can go and it is all for the pussy! I am crushed, I am sad, I feel completely lost and out of touch. I love my Son with all my heart but I hate what He is doing. He is getting drunk, being irresponsible with the children when He gets them, He is simply in a very bad place and as a Daddy I am lost to what to do. So I ask you all to pray for me, my Son and my Family. Family means everything to me, this is why the Brotherhood is set up like a family. I know Jesus is in my Son and I know that He will not leave Him, I just hope my Son sees this before He wrecks what is left to the relationship.

That's terrible, so sorry to hear that. Definitely sending prayers and energy your way!

 

[quazimodo_007]

FlashGordon whats your sleep schedule and how do you sleep?

 

[quazimodo_007]

Again last night, I think!

Let me explain. Obviously I am a Christ follower with great love for Jesus. I say "I think" because I never truly know without investigating. The enemy will attack me when I am completely delirious and without my functions. This happens when I stay up too late and am on sleeping medication. This is when I am weak and it becomes hard to stop. The enemy is pussy and a coward and will only attack me when I am without my faculties, never when I am awake. Last night I was not sure if I messed up or not. When I woke up I did not remember either. It was not until I checked my history that I found out. This is where I find a great deal of joy as I can honestly say it was not me, it was the sin that still in me. This is in no way an excuse, I can be more disciplined with myself and take my medication and go to sleep according to the schedule and I will not fall into the enemies trap. I will waste not a moment in guilt on something I have no recollection of. And when I did see the history files I gave no credit to the enemy, I said "Fuck off bitch! I did this, not you!, be gone coward!" when we take the power from the enemy in this way there is no satisfaction on his part.

I have been going through the most trying time in my life right now so I am seeing myself do things I truly do not want to do. In times of stress, anxiety, depression, etc. I am never hard on myself for a wrong I may have committed against myself. I know that I am human and I will sometimes reach for the old ways of dealing with things. What matters most to me is the fact Jesus forgave me of all of my sins, past, present and future leaving no satisfaction for the cowardly pussy enemy!

We do not win every battle we fight. Your sons life is your sons life, if he doesn't listen there is nothing you can do.You can only be there to lift him up when he falls and help his children when they need help. I will keep you and all your family in my prayers.

 

[Big Schwanz Acht]

We do not win every battle we fight. Your sons life is your sons life, if he doesn't listen there is nothing you can do.You can only be there to lift him up when he falls and help his children when they need help. I will keep you and all your family in my prayers.

wise words.

Once your son has lifted the fog he's in, he'll understand the chaos and pain he's created. Having a solid moral compass and a strong parent will pilot him through...it just may create a bit of collateral damage.

I'd be more than happy to provide a disinterested 3rd party perspective if he's ever open to it...you know how to reach me

 

[Big Schwanz Acht]

be prepared for the marriage to end (women never forget and rarely forgive) and in the 1% chance they survive as a couple, the affair will always tarnish/taint their every step.
I'd agree in the sense that there're fundamental issues causing him to look outside, but it's also in our biology as men to seek/hunt and therefore be susceptible to straying (not giving excuses). We are bound by our words/promises and for your son to jeopardize all that he's worked hard to build there must be a compelling draw that's so strong as to make this a worthwhile trade.
As adults, it's our choice to behave as we see fit...the real tragedy is when children are swept-up in the selfishness of their parent(s)

 

[quazimodo_007]

fell off the horse while ill damn damn damn

 

[DLD]

fell off the horse while ill damn damn damn

Get right back on it! It is only a fall, never a fail. Get back on a ride even further this time! And if you do fall, do not punish yourself, you are attempting a very difficult issue and it will take time to get under control.

 

[quazimodo_007]

Get right back on it! It is only a fall, never a fail. Get back on a ride even further this time! And if you do fall, do not punish yourself, you are attempting a very difficult issue and it will take time to get under control.

Thanks Yes im back on but being ill just made me lose my will, but i guess i wanted the dopamine which i get from the adult entertainment.

 

[DLD]

Thanks Yes im back on but being ill just made me lose my will, but i guess i wanted the dopamine which i get from the adult entertainment.

I hear you but also know that dopamine can come from many other sources. You have identified an issue now you simply need to correct it. Certain triggers for me I had to eliminate to have the best shot at curbing this habit. As I identify triggers I put in place safety measures. But, just like you. I am not perfect and I will contnue to pick myself up and keep climbing that hill!