What do I do?

[flair1981]

Hey all, I just want to use this post to get some things out and mabey get some advice. Im not trying to get sympathy or anything but Im going to be honest about things here. First off the job I was up for didnt go through. I found out today when I went to do my weekly "checking in" that 4 others were hired and I wasnt. The bad thing is that I absolutley dont have any idea of where to look next. Ive put in for everything in my area and no one needs help right now. I feel so low right now not only as a man but as a husband and father. The honest truth is, since 10am this morning, all I can think about is what can I do to end this feeling of helplessness and pain. I want to put the ol 12 gauge to my forehead and have at it. Ive never had these thoughts before, its a weird feeling. But I know that if I do that, itll cause my family and kids alot more pain then they can handle, so thats not an option although I wish it was. Whats a guy supposed to do? I feel so small and crushed. Im getting depressed again for the 3rd time since my big freakin layoff in 2002. My wife does have a job or we would be screwed. But she started working only 3 years ago just because she wanted to. She says not to worry but Im telling you, a man is supposed to support his family if physically able, and I havent been able to in a while. I just cant belive how things have turned. I worked my butt off for 8 years for a company who sold us all out to move operations overseas and my government doesnt care what so ever. I dont understand what happened this morning with that job. I did all the things I was asked and advised to do to get the spot. I relize it is alot of politics involved since it was a county job, but still. I also followed up on 3 other jobs I applied for after the news today, 2 out of 3 were supposed to call me later on today...No calls!! Im going crazy here. #$%@@!

 

[twins172_up]

flair i know how you are feeling...it is killing me that i can't do for my son and his mother want i need to do...tomorrow is my last day here and i've been living from check to check for a while....sometimes i feel like just getting up and start walking...no where in particlar...just to get away from all the bullshit...but our families needs us...if we can not pull our weight financially...we still need to be there physically and emotionally....you need to be strong for your wife and your kids...i'm sure they are looking at you to be the backbone of the family...you have to hold yourself together for them...i know it is hard...sometimes i can't even talk to anyone cuz i feel like i am going to explode...but i talk to my sons mother...she goes through worse than what i am dealing with...so we look towards eachother for support...somedays the pep talk doesn't help and somedays it does...you are still a man...regardless how you feel about your situation...i am going to pray that something comes through for you...keep trying atleast for your family...good luck flair

 

[BeBobBox]

where do you live? go to a better town with more and better jobs