women are insecure too

thedash

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Mar 28, 2004
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71
Just a thought I wanted to put out there for all of us guys who are so insecure, that stemmed from a conversation with my girlfriend. Somehow we got on the topic of my past girlfriends, or actually, it was a more general discussion about things that we haven't tried sexually, that we may or may not want to do together. Basically about our desires and fantasies. And on a couple of topics, she asked if I had ever done that, because she hadn't, and there were a couple that she said that she probably wouldn't do. And when I told her that I had done those before, she became very insecure saying that she must not be as adventurous as my past girlfriends, and said, see - women can be insecure too.

I assured her that she definitely had nothing to be insecure about. I said it's like me worrying about her past boyfriends, about whether they were bigger and better. She said that she only had one that was bigger, and that he definitely was not better, and that he just simply hurt her. Being in her 30's, she has been around, and unlike younger girls, who simply think bigger is better, she said that for her personally, that wasn't the case at all.

At 7 x 5.5, she says she doesn't want me to be bigger, because it can already be a little uncomfortable in certain positions. So anyway, here I have always been very insecure, when there is absolutely no reason to be so.

Then I got to thinking, and I think this is the main point I want to make, especially in relation to guys who worry if their girl has had bigger in the past, and that it was better. One of my past girlfriends was very tight. I mean really tight, could hardly get it in. But that in itself, whereas it might have felt a little better in a way, did not make the experience the best sex I have had. It was far from it. Not that she was terrible, she wasn't. She was really good overall. But it just came nowhere near to current girlfriend, who is nice and snug, but the overall experience, is just unlike any woman that I have been with.

So, even if the tighter pussy, in and of itself, felt somewhat better, that in no way takes away from my current girlfriend, because trust me, she is so amazing. I don't sit and think about that girl in my past, wishing my current girlfriend was that tight. And just like bigger isn't necessarily bigger, tighter isn't either. In fact, it presents problems, and can make things difficult and uncomfortable. And even if in a way, it was better, it just simply is a small part of a larger equation.

So anyway, I guess this is just to point out, that regardless of her past, just like regardless or your past, there is really no reason to fret and think that the end all and be all, is in the size of your dick - especially in long term relationships. One night stands might be a little different, but in serious relationships, your dick, unless extremely small, or extremely large, is not going to be an issue at all. If it is an issue, it is only an issue in your mind.

Think about it for a second, do you think and worry more about if you are good enough, or if she is good enough? That's right, 99% of the time, if you worry, you are worrying if you are good enough. And the same goes for her, in your mind, you are thinking that she's thinking in the back of her mind that some guy in her past was bigger and better, when that's the furthest thing from her mind. She's worrying if she is good enough, and probably more specifically, if she looks good enough.

So everyone needs to just stop worrying, and get back to having amazing mind blowing sex!!! (i'm speaking to myself, more than everyone else, but just wanted to pass these thoughts on in case they might help put someone else's mind to ease)
 
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Excellent post. Good read. I never thought about it like that.
 

millionman

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True story...Women in my experiences are seriously insecure about how they look during sex...Great post bro....
 

thedash

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Mar 28, 2004
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Her previous boyfriend, who she was with for 7 years was a bit smaller than me, closer to 5. Back when she was dating him, her and I were friends, and we used to talk about everything, and I mean everything. She never had any complaints about his size. Her complaints were about the duration, which was rarely over 5 minutes, if that much. And also the frequency. And even then, that wasn't what ended their relationship, it was that he started becoming very controlling and was basically a jerk.

One of the things she has told me recently, was that neither he, nor any of her previous boyfriends, really knew what they were doing (especially when going down on her) and were not creative at all when it came to sex. And she also said that none of them stirred her imagination like i do, you see, our foreplay starts long before we get into the bedroom. We say things to each other during the day, and tease each other. So by the time we finally do get together, it takes things to a whole new level, and just makes it even that much better because by then we just can't wait to get our hands on each other.

I am in my mid 30's, but I am not going to sit here and say that I am more experienced that younger guys, because I really am not that experienced. But I do invest time learning everything I can when it comes to the female anatomy, and women's desires and needs.

I am certainly not saying Penis Enlargement is not worthwhile, because even I haven't quit, because I still think a little more size would just be a little bonus as long as I don't get too big. But I am saying that you should also invest time in other areas, learning as much as you can, if you truly want to satisfy a woman.
 

gorillaunit

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Mar 29, 2004
Messages
232
thedash said:
One of the things she has told me recently, was that neither he, nor any of her previous boyfriends, really knew what they were doing (especially when going down on her).

okay, this caught my attention. i'm like you in that i want to learn more and more. so, when i hear a statement like that, i want to know what they did wrong AND how to do it right. i thought going down on a girl can't be that difficult, right? obviously if you shouldn't jump right into licking the clit but what else should i know? can you help me out? maybe your g/f can help give advice as well. thanks.
 

thedash

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Joined
Mar 28, 2004
Messages
71
Well, I never got around to asking what they did wrong, but like you, I was kind of wondering myself, because it didn't seem like rocket science to me either. I just never got around to asking, at the time, I was just happy that she thought I did a wonderful job at it. I think willingness and enthusiasm is the main thing, first and foremost. The willingness to do it often, and go the distance. And apparently some guys are clueless, don't know where the clit is, and I guess they miss the spot at the crucial moment.

If you want more information though for some more tips, go to about.com and do a search on "how to perform cunnilingus".

One tip that I must pass on to you though, is that if you stimulate her g-spot at the same time you are going down on her, she will go fucking nuts. Just insert two fingers with your palm up and do sort of a come hither motion with your fingers, the g-spot is in the front wall, usually about 2 inches in (basically right behind her clit).
 

gorillaunit

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232
thedash said:
Well, I never got around to asking what they did wrong, but like you, I was kind of wondering myself, because it didn't seem like rocket science to me either. I just never got around to asking, at the time, I was just happy that she thought I did a wonderful job at it. I think willingness and enthusiasm is the main thing, first and foremost. The willingness to do it often, and go the distance. And apparently some guys are clueless, don't know where the clit is, and I guess they miss the spot at the crucial moment.

If you want more information though for some more tips, go to about.com and do a search on "how to perform cunnilingus".

One tip that I must pass on to you though, is that if you stimulate her g-spot at the same time you are going down on her, she will go fucking nuts. Just insert two fingers with your palm up and do sort of a come hither motion with your fingers, the g-spot is in the front wall, usually about 2 inches in (basically right behind her clit).
yeah, i've heard that women can tell if the guy isn't in to it or doesn't really want to be down there...and that's a turnoff for them. i think the same applies for men too.
btw, when stimulating the g-spot, do you press hard, soft, or in between?
thanks.
 
S

stillwantmore

Guest
gorillaunit said:
yeah, i've heard that women can tell if the guy isn't in to it or doesn't really want to be down there...and that's a turnoff for them. i think the same applies for men too.
btw, when stimulating the g-spot, do you press hard, soft, or in between?
thanks.
Well, back in the day when I had a woman that loved to get oral from me....

I seem to recall that she enjoyed varying pressure on her G spot. Stimulating the G spot is also part of the key, the main ingredient per se to getting a girl to "squirt". She has to be very aroused and very relaxed. If she says "stop, I have to pee!" Especially if you KNOW she's already gone, tell her to relax and just 'let go'.
 
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Great thread
 

gorillaunit

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232
stillwantmore said:
Well, back in the day when I had a woman that loved to get oral from me....

I seem to recall that she enjoyed varying pressure on her G spot. Stimulating the G spot is also part of the key, the main ingredient per se to getting a girl to "squirt". She has to be very aroused and very relaxed. If she says "stop, I have to pee!" Especially if you KNOW she's already gone, tell her to relax and just 'let go'.
it's true though, that not every girl is capable of this, right?
btw, what if she hasn't gone to pee in a while? should she still relax and let go?
 
D

DVD

Guest
thedash said:
Just a thought I wanted to put out there for all of us guys who are so insecure, that stemmed from a conversation with my girlfriend. Somehow we got on the topic of my past girlfriends, or actually, it was a more general discussion about things that we haven't tried sexually, that we may or may not want to do together. Basically about our desires and fantasies. And on a couple of topics, she asked if I had ever done that, because she hadn't, and there were a couple that she said that she probably wouldn't do. And when I told her that I had done those before, she became very insecure saying that she must not be as adventurous as my past girlfriends, and said, see - women can be insecure too.

I assured her that she definitely had nothing to be insecure about. I said it's like me worrying about her past boyfriends, about whether they were bigger and better. She said that she only had one that was bigger, and that he definitely was not better, and that he just simply hurt her. Being in her 30's, she has been around, and unlike younger girls, who simply think bigger is better, she said that for her personally, that wasn't the case at all.

At 7 x 5.5, she says she doesn't want me to be bigger, because it can already be a little uncomfortable in certain positions. So anyway, here I have always been very insecure, when there is absolutely no reason to be so.

Then I got to thinking, and I think this is the main point I want to make, especially in relation to guys who worry if their girl has had bigger in the past, and that it was better. One of my past girlfriends was very tight. I mean really tight, could hardly get it in. But that in itself, whereas it might have felt a little better in a way, did not make the experience the best sex I have had. It was far from it. Not that she was terrible, she wasn't. She was really good overall. But it just came nowhere near to current girlfriend, who is nice and snug, but the overall experience, is just unlike any woman that I have been with.

So, even if the tighter pussy, in and of itself, felt somewhat better, that in no way takes away from my current girlfriend, because trust me, she is so amazing. I don't sit and think about that girl in my past, wishing my current girlfriend was that tight. And just like bigger isn't necessarily bigger, tighter isn't either. In fact, it presents problems, and can make things difficult and uncomfortable. And even if in a way, it was better, it just simply is a small part of a larger equation.

So anyway, I guess this is just to point out, that regardless of her past, just like regardless or your past, there is really no reason to fret and think that the end all and be all, is in the size of your dick - especially in long term relationships. One night stands might be a little different, but in serious relationships, your dick, unless extremely small, or extremely large, is not going to be an issue at all. If it is an issue, it is only an issue in your mind.

Think about it for a second, do you think and worry more about if you are good enough, or if she is good enough? That's right, 99% of the time, if you worry, you are worrying if you are good enough. And the same goes for her, in your mind, you are thinking that she's thinking in the back of her mind that some guy in her past was bigger and better, when that's the furthest thing from her mind. She's worrying if she is good enough, and probably more specifically, if she looks good enough.

So everyone needs to just stop worrying, and get back to having amazing mind blowing sex!!! (i'm speaking to myself, more than everyone else, but just wanted to pass these thoughts on in case they might help put someone else's mind to ease)
:clap: A DAMN GOOD READ!! Never thought of it like that :)
 

crazyed27

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Nov 25, 2003
Messages
2,621
millionman said:
True story...Women in my experiences are seriously insecure about how they look during sex...Great post bro....

yeah that is why they want to have the lights out during sex, because they are insecure! Which make my dick look even bigger. LOL
 

crazyed27

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Joined
Nov 25, 2003
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gorillaunit said:
it's true though, that not every girl is capable of this, right?
btw, what if she hasn't gone to pee in a while? should she still relax and let go?


No not a good choice I tols my girl once to let it go and relax, while she was rideing me, and I ended up with a golden shower !
 
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