LIBERATING STRESS! sorry..

kurei

Member
i know this hasnt anything to do with anything or anybody in here,, but im passing through such a f*cking hard time in my life right now.. and its pissing me off.. im having problems with everyone! my parents my gf.. my roomate.. i just dont kniow what to do anymore.. i mean.. the thing is i cant comprehend why.. everything i do is just wso wrong to them and theyre always fighting and arguing.. the only thing that keeps me up is the good grades.. if that was also wrong i would fuckin shot myseklf long ago.. i dunno.. i cant take it anymore.. i dont know what to do and its ruining everything for me.. i dont want toi go out anymore.. adn when i do i am just unable to have a good time.. the thing is that im not blaming anybody but myself.. because it CANT be their fault because im having problems with almost eveybody so they cant be wrong there... i really have no clue as to what to do in my life right now.. the problems are
with my parents- they just cant deal with the fact that im living alone and away from home.. i study in alike 3 hour car ride from home.. i dont mind comming home everyweekend because they ask me too.. but i cant do it ALL the time..! i have OTHER things to do.. ive been away from home for almost a year and a half and they still cant deal with it.. they call me every week and blame me for everything that goes wrong.. i just cant take it and EXPLODE and start arguing.... AGGHHH...
with my gf- she was away studying abroad.. for some time.. she came back because she couldnt take the pressure.. Penis EnlargementRFECT! but no! now that she is here she doesnt understand that i HAVE TO WORK adn that i HAVE TO STUDY.. she also lives i like a 3 hour car ride... but i cant dedicate all the time i have to her and her alone.. i practically stopped smoking weed because she asked me to.. i dont even have a beer anymore to relax some times.. i dont go out to the discos with my friends because that alwasy brings trouble... she just doesnt understand that i have other things to do.. if i had nothing to do id gladly be with her all the time she wanted.. but some times i just cant!
my roommate- i swear to god that hes doing things on purpose to piss me off.. ive known him my whole life.. we studied at the same school and were neighbors.. best friend all through grade school middel school and high school.. now on the university especially this year i cant fuckin stand him.. he just keeps blabbing on about how he is tired of studying.. PLUS he knows i study something really hard but noo.. he just doesnt understand a cranks up the music..... FUCKIN biatch..

anyways sorry for posting crap that people wont read.. its just that i dunno.. i feel like getting in the car and just leaving everything behind... i dunno am i wrong?!?! ahh..
 

DLD

doublelongdaddy
Staff member
It does not sound like you are doing anything wrong. It sounds as though those around you are very good at pushing your buttons and you are very good at feeling guilty about it. Parents at one point need to let their children go. The fact that they are blaming things on your not being there is totally irrational. But as you have already found out, you can't change them. No matter how hard I try with my own parents they are stuck in their ways. I am the scape goat of the family and I am the one who receives very little praise. For a long time I fought this position. I though I could change them, I thought I could argue some sense into them...but this will never happen. I had to learn to politely ignore the things that bothered me. Over time my attitude has changed to, "I have to love them but I don't have to like everything about them" In families everyone plays a role and this stigma, unfortunately, follows us through our lives. Be firm with them in a gentle way ;) Let them know your priorities and ask them to accept you for you. If they choose not to respect your wishes you have done all you can.

With the girlfriend I would apply the same thing. Let her know your priorities and ask her if she can accept you this way. If she can not then again that is on her and she needs to make a decision.

As far as your room mate is concerned I can relate. When I was younger a good friend moved in with me. It was great up until our first disagreement. Eventually we started detesting each other. We were lucky enough to decide to keep the friendship by eliminating the roommate. It was a tough choice but today we are still good friends and the room mate crap is a distant memory.

You vented your frustrations here which is good but now you need to make some moves to correct your situation.
 
i know what you mean with the parents thing. my parents always call me when they are overseas (like EVERY FUCKING DAY). it is so ridiculous. when i'm out when they call, the next day they will ask me where i went, who i went with and how long i was out. IT IS FUCKING BULLSHIT. thank god i'll be living by myself for the next 3 years, so i can unplug the phone if i really have to, hehe.

but i know what you mean. i would just tell them all to fuck off more or less. show them that you don't care and they can go leave you alone as you have better things to do. show them that their life sucks and you don't wanna fuck it up like they did. that tends to shut my parents up in a matter of seconds.
 

C-Guy

Member
Kurei I felt the pain in your tone of writing. I can relate to everything you said. I lived my life being everyones puppet moving when they pushed my buttons or pulled my strings.

As for your parents have an honest talk with them and in a KIND way not threatening tell them...Mom, Dad I appreciate the years you have shaped and molded my life. I appreciate that you have been there thru good and bad. But, I'm an adult now and i have my own choices to make. You need to trust yourself that up to this point you have instilled enough wisdom in me that i will make the right choices. Either way you win.

As for the girfriend, stop and think about it. What is she really saying? Does she not trust you, or is she trying to control you?Believe me man i just got out of a marriage that was like what you are talking about. My ex could be out 8-10 hours later than she said she would be and all hell broke loose if I said anything about it. But, if I was 30 min late getting home from she wanted a full account of who, what, when, where, why , and how. You should both have a heart to heart as well. Nobody should have to live under that much stress.

As for the roomie, i'll have to get back to ya. Right now i'm having a blond moment and i'm not even blond.
 

kurei

Member
sorry i hadnt replied to this.. but yeah.. i thank everyone of you for your kind and wise words.. i think that its not my fault that i have these "problems" but only I can deal with them....

anyways i totally agree with the u have to love your parents but u dont have to like them.. god bless the guy who said that..
 

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